My First Love (JoPRBooks)

*Takes a deep breath in and out*

Okayy err hey guyss. so this is my entry to the competion for the amaizing writer JoPRBooks. First things first i am NOT a writer . Iv never writen anything in my life. but hey theres a first time for everything right?, so, if your looking to read a profesional, well edited, high quality text with no grammer or spelling mistakes, then this wont be for you.

It most definetly is not a winners piece

The the thought of writing this wouldnt have even crossed my mind if it wasnt for how much i love F.A.I.T.H. I feel like i should try and give something in return for all of JoPRBooks effeorts in writing an amazing book. I know this is no way going to repay for all of JoPRBooks efforts but i guess its better than nothing. The thought and efforts counts right??. She makes writing seem so easy and natural. :)

Her and a few others have given me hope and inspiration to write.

Ps ... please can you listen to the song on the right. Everytime i listen to it it reminds me of F.A.I.T.H. I guess its the lyrics that does.

Anyhu, here goes nothing ... :)

I realised that if something was meant to happen... it will. Nothing happens in life without a valid reason. We may not always understand it, we may not like it, but we just have to accept it. I guess that  there is always something better in store.

I'v realised that this thing between us could be so much ... yet nothing at all.

I'v learnt that no amount of distance can change what the heart wants.

I'v learnt to just accept things the way they are, see where life takes us, take it one step at time and not rush anything.

I'v also learnt to not loose hope because there is always someone special out there for everyone. Your special someone that's out there is the one person in he world who will stick by you through thick and thin. The prson who will love and accept you for who you are incuding all the  flows.

You'll learn to accept someone else's imperfections, you will learn to love them and understand that those traits make the person who they are because no one is perfect, even if people seem perfect to .. they most definitely are not, so the beauty of love, is learning to find happiness with the imperfections aswell as the good traits.

Only ... and .... only  once ....  you have truly mastered those skills  is when you will be ready to love. Ensure you tresure this love. Ensure you never ever let go of this love ....  take risks ....  even if they scare you. 

In a relationship you will obviously go through ups and downs. You can't escape them. Its inevitable but the moments where everything isn't hunky dorey will determine everything. It's the ultimate test. The test which will reveal all

... The people who lets those moments completely ruin the relationship, the people who don't stand up or even fight for each other  have failed the test. The connection between the two was/is not love, however, those people who forgive and forget the moments of hurt, whofights, moves on and tries to  mend the relationship, have passed/ pass/ will pass the test. This ... in my eyes is love. Accepting each other for who they are and not letting them go. That is the pair that are made for each other.

Love ..... such a strong word .... It's pretty much undefinable. 

There are many perceptions of love ... such as  'love is infinite' and 'The first love will always leave a special place in your heart' ect ect. These are all true, However .... They could be the happiness and reality for many people... but for others ... it's far from reality. That could be the reason they may not believe in love or not feel very fond of the idea. They feel isolated, alone, alien with endless amount of questions running through their minds ... 24/7. Including the infamous .... why, why, and why?.

Personally, I feel that there is no need to rush love because when the time comes, the experience is going to be amazing and priceless. It will never disappoint. So for those people who haven't had a boyfriend yet or have never been in love, don't fret about it. I feel that each and every single one of us will get our 'Happy ever after'. Its just not going to be the same as everyone elses. It may not be the typical 'Happy Ever After' that you're used to,  but its your story, your reality and your very own ending which no one else will have. Each ending is ... beautifull and amaizing.  Learn to love it. Learn to appreciate it and most importantly celebrate it. Celebrate the fact that your story is unique. Scream it from the roof top. Why would you want to be the same as everyone else?  normal is overratted :P ... Plus people are more drawn to new ideas and events right? 

Each individuals view on love is different. Everyone is unique. Most people will accept it, others will fight it, (wether that be for or against it), some people will run away from love and in other cases people may even run away from love. 

To be honest with you the word 'Love' shouldn't be said half heartedly. The word is used very often by many of us, im not saying theres anything wrong in that im just saying dont use the word lightly. Only say the word 'Love' if u truly mean it, beacuse it is such a powerfull word.

... So powerfull that it can make or break a person. Can you imagine/ remember the feeling of being told that someone loves you?. weather it be your family or friends, im 100% sure that it made you happy. so, imagine finding out that the feeling is not true or as strong as you hoped or expected it to be. You would be crushed right? ... 

The most important fact is that the definition of love is not only the connection between the opposite genders. Love can also be present between friends. To be quite honest with you, the first true experience of love i'v had is probably with my friends.

Yes ... very cringe worthy ... but true.

Iv known them for around 6 years now ... and some others longer.

Unfortunately, since the new school year has started, my closest friend attends a different college to me. I only see her in my evening classes. Im actually really gutted. . I had a little cry about it. On the plus side my other really good friends, who are amazing, attend the same college as me. Woooo. But iv realised things always happen for a reason, also I'm very lucky i get to see her in my evening classes at least. As cliche as this may sound its actually brought us closer. This experience has taught me to not take anything or anyone for granted and appreciate every moment. Time is not on our side. I guess as we grow up, things will always change. No matter how much we don't want to move on and adapt to a different environment, routine or experiences, we have to learn to accept that things won't always remain the same. Thats obviously easier said than done but its not impossible. The way we deal with the changes what will affect us.

With experience we will grow, so don't be afraid to take risks

 Before we accept anyone elses love, we need to accept ourselves. We need to have self worth. We have to feel confident and comfortable with ourselves ... 

In all honestly im truly afraid to love or even apprehend the fact that someone is intrested in me. I have the fear that the moment they see the real me they will run away. I dread to see the regret within them.  I fear dissaopinting people. I fear not living up to their expectations. I fear not being accepted with my flaws.

Like i said before ... in a relationship there is alway is going to be heart ache and pain. I guess thats what makes the relationship stronger. It could also make the individuals stronger.  Despite that all , im petrified of this day to come. 

It makes me feel sick to the pit of my stomach.

It crosses my mind every single day.

Hey guys, okay i know that this one shot was extremely boring.

I know that you have obviously read things that are a million times better but I'm just starting out

As you can most probably tell my english skills suck:\ My grammar, word choice and spelling all suck aswell so please excuse them. Infact, please can you help me improve by leaving a comment. Pretty please with a cherry on top

lots of love

Fee