The day bleeds into nightfall

'You see her when you fall asleep, but never to touch and never to keep'

A/N Mentions of dead bodies throughout the chapter.

Thursday 25th June 2037

Joe wonders how the sun can keep on shining, now that she's gone. Each time he sees it rise, it's another day Ruby isn't coming home. He has to go and identify her today, having volunteered. He didn't want Dianne to have to face that task, it's not fair. He is going to double check, to see if she does want to come. He's going with his dad, because there is every chance he will breakdown before he sees her for, what he assumes, to be one of the last times.

No one knows what she is going to look like, she's had her autopsy report and it was nothing but a tragic accident, she can come home to be buried in their local cemetery. A place that they will be able to say goodbye.

The whole house seems to have just existed over the last ten days, neither of the kids had tried school again. He knew that Maddie was wanting to go back far too early, but he had to give her the option. He had to give both of them the option.

He hadn't really seen Theo much, apart from the occasional time he left him room to go and get food or to pee. He wondered what he was doing in there, he assumes he was playing video games, but he wasn't sure. Maddie, on the other hand, she was sleeping on the sofa. Many a time had he walked in to make a coffee and found her lying there. Some of the times, he would stand back watching her breathe, just to check that she was okay, just like he had done when she was tiny. If she wasn't sleep, she would have some stupid TV show he didn't know the name of in the background.

And then there was Dianne. She had barely spoken, besides the necessities, like when he told her he would go to identify the body. She had laid in bed for the last ten days, with the curtains shut. Not that he was counting, but he knew she had only showered twice. He was worried about her, she hadn't spoken to the kids. She didn't even make a comment when she found out Maddie had tried school. She just laid there, looking into space. He didn't know if she slept or not, but she had shimmied away when he tried to cuddle her. He knew he had to be strong, for all of them, but it was so, so hard.

'Are you coming?' He asks quietly, as he opens the curtain a little bit. It was the first time he had done so, his eyes squinting at the natural light. He watched as Dianne propped herself up with her elbows. He noted she looked like a ghost. One year, in secondary school, they had dressed up as ghosts. He didn't know it was possible, but she looked even paler than she did then. She looks ill, really ill. He doesn't know what to say. He's met with a shake of her head, as he nods as he changes his sweatpants for his jeans.

'Tell her I love her.' She chokes out. 'Please tell her I love her and that I am really sorry. I just can't.' He nods, swallowing the sob that threatens to explode. If he was like this now, how would he be when he's there? It was his job to protect her, when she was little it was from the monster under the bed, as she got older it became protecting her from boys breaking her heart. Yet, he had failed. She still had her heartbroken, he had failed to prevent that. Maybe he had driven her into dating that twat? Maybe it was because of him.

Most importantly, he had failed to protect her at university. If he had insisted on picking her up that night, like Dianne wanted, she would be there. Whilst he was trying to let her enjoy her life, he had failed and, as a result of that, she was lying stone dead in a morgue. As much as he wanted to believe that this wasn't true, he knew deep down it would be his baby girl. She would be the one on the table, but until he saw her there, he could pretend that it wasn't her.

He didn't say much to his dad, he had never experienced this before. What is the done thing? He didn't want his dad to think he was weak, he knows he's being stupid but the moment he lets his guard down he didn't think he would ever stop crying.