feel like im loosing my mind

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Later that night, you got alastor up to his room after her finished sobbing into the back of your neck.
He ended up pulling you into his bed and holding you tightly, but not to hard. You didn't mind that he was like this with you, you know that he's going through the trauma of what happened.

You sat there in bed with alastor as he holds you close, and you tried to get some rest to.
That is until you felt stabbing pain on your waist.
You groan quietly and look down to see alastors nails digging into your skin. You let go of him as his clutches his head in his sleep, having a painful expression on his face, tears rolling down his cheeks.
Your heart sinks  and you hold his hand tightly.
" Alastor.... Alastor, wake up!.. " You say. He immediately jumps up, hyperventilating and sweating a bit. Tears rolled down his cheeks and his body shook like an earthquake.
" I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry...... " He says on repeat, hugging his knees to his chest.
You pull him close, and he clings to you, burying his face in your chest.
" It's ok alastor... I'm here... I'm right here... " You say softly.
He stops and looks at your waist. His eyes looked filled with sorrow and fear.
" Did... D-did I do this?.. " He said  voice glitch in up a bit. You bite your lip, and think of something fast.
" N-no  no no! I just got a bit itchy and scratched my skin off... I'll be ok.. ~" You say holding his hand. He gently rubs your hand with his thumb and nuzzles into your neck, tears still going down his face. You hold onto him the whole time, saying sweet things to him, telling him how much you love him, and kissing him on the cheek. You knew that he was feeling better when you heard little tiny purrs from him as he curls up next to you and falls asleep holding your hand. You stay up the rest of the night so that he wouldn't have anymore freak outs, and any time he looked a bit distressed, you rubbed his cheek and telling him that your there with him, and his fears seems to go away.

The next morning, almost everyone was checking if alastor was ok  because apparently Lucifer shared the information about was happened to him in that awful place. Angel walks up to him while he was pacing around a bit. " H-hey alastor.. Are you ok?.. I heard about what happened to you a-" Angel dust was completely shocked when alastor gave him a death stare.
" Will you people please STOP ASKING ME IF I'M OK?!?! BECAUSE IT'S OBVIOUS THAT I'M NOT, I'M LOOSING MY MIND, AND WHY?!? THE VOICES IN MY HEAD ARE GETTING LOUDER AND IT HURTS!!!! CANT YOU SEE I'M LOOSING MY MIND?!?!" he yell, pulling his hair and sinking to the floor while everyone is shocked and scared. Alastor had never really done that in the past, but things happen and sometimes people just. Snap...
He shakes violently and his whole body seems to glitch out.
You run over and before alastor could see whole her is his head snaps up with a loud crack.
" GET AWA-... " he falls silent when you hug him tightly. A few tears roll down your cheek seeing the man you love in such a painful state. He wraps his arm around you and burys his face in your neck, getting your shirt a bit wet with tears, but you don't mind. Not at all. You hum a soft melody to him, the song some where over the rainbow, it was always your favorite. Alastors ears were down and his smile was gone, but you stayed with him the whole time. He was still your patient.
You stood up and led him over to the couch and sat him down, and he pulled you in his lap like last time. He cuddled you closely the whole time, not wanting you to leave his side. You gently lift his chin and look at his eyes.
" Alastor.. What happened to your beautiful smile?.. " You ask him. He holds your hand against his cheek and smiles softly.
" I'm smiling my dear.. I'm smiling... ~" He whispers. You smile back and wrap your arms around his neck, giving him a peck on the lips and then hugging him.
" You know you can talk to me... I'm still your doctor through and through.. " You say to him.
His ears perk up a bit and his tail wags a little.
" Through and through... Like forever?.. " He asks.
" Yes alastor... Forever... ~"
He hugs you tighly, saying thank you over and over again. You smile warmly now that he's alright.
" So.. Do you wanna talk about it?.. " You ask softly. He nods slowly.
" I-i just get nervous when doing this because I don't want to scare you away.. " He whispers with his head down. You hold his cheeks and look deeply into his eyes.
" I would never be afraid of the man I love.. ~" You say, kissing his cheek.
He smiles a bit and breaths in.
" I have been hearing voices in my head lately... And some of them are saying to hurt you... But I don't want to hurt you... I can't.... " He says, retreating back into your neck. You stroke his hair softly.
" Hey.. I know you won't hurt me... If I thought you would hurt me, you would not be seeing me right now... But I'm here with you... Till the end of the line.. ~" You say, softly planting a kiss on his lips. He pulls you closer, deepening it. He runs his fingers through your hair softly, but he slowly pulled back, looking into your eyes. Your soft purple eyes. ( now that your a demon)
" I love you with all of my heart and soul (y/n)... I would give the world to you if I could,.. " He says, holding both of my hands. You smile and squeeze his hands.
" Well, you gave me the honor of being your gal, and I get to be with you till the end of the line, so you already did. ~" You say, almost singing.
You could hear his tail wags as it brushes against the couch and his ears go up. And the best part was, he had his good old smile back, and you could tell it was real, his eyes lit up like you set of a fire work in his heart. He stands up quickly and spins you around, dipping you and giving you a big kiss. You in response wrap your arms around his neck.
Looking into his eyes, you ask him, " Are you doing better?. " He looks down at you and brushes a lock of hair behind your ear. " Definitely, I just hope I can stay like it~" He says.
You smile and hug him tightly.
You knew you could get him through this, and you were going to be with him the whole time and after. Until you could live a love happy life in hell with the man you love!

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