Pain to Poetry

4•

     I looked at you again today, in awe at how it seemed like you were the one who made the sun shine. And the way the stars seemed to be jealous of the way you wore your scars like diamonds, shining so bright. I felt my breath hitch as I saw you smile, as I felt my self falling again like the first time.

But what's the point?

And that's what hurts the most. When I realize the fact that actually, you weren't the one to make the sun shine, you were the cause of my tears, and the blood that flows down my cuts. When I realize that your smile was reserved only for her. Not me. Why? Oh just why couldn't you smile at me like that? Love me like you love her? And look at me like I'm your world, the way you look at her.

        I turned my heart to stone, yet hear it crack each time she leaves you alone. I turn my heart to iron, yet it rusts each time you smile through your pain. I wanted you to let her go, replace her with me because she wasn't good for you. But I know that I can't ask that of you, for I could never replace you too...

  'Cause you love her just the way I love you, too toxic for one another..