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word count; 1448
Alessandra
It took a few days to plan everything out. I avoided Henry like the devil, but it did not prevent him from hovering by me every so often. Lorenzo persisted with his plans, reminding me that I had a duty. All I had to do was listen, knowing that I had a saviour in Francesco. It could simply be as a result of his kindness, but I found a new, favourable view of Francesco. He was kind and handsome, I could not ask for more.
I still feared the potential reaction, however, as I knew that my brother would not approve of two of his sisters making their own matches - paticularly to two men from the same family. It was not as much of a 'widespread' benefit as I believed my brother would wish for our family. He believed Henry would be the greatest prize I could win. Lorenzo was no fool; he knew Henry's interest in me would wane and die, or so he believed. He knew not the true extent of our relationship and I wished to keep it so, for otherwise, I would spend my entire life in fear of Lorenzo finding grounds for anullment.
"You look tense." Francesco's observation was kindly meant but it did little to ease my nerves. We were to be married in the eyes of God, an indissoluable commitment that would only be broken through death. His eyes were on me as I glanced up to meet them, a soft smile curling upon my lips.
"Apologies," I said, feeling my cheeks burn ablaze as he kept his eyes on me. I could see them from the side of my eye, watching my every move. It was as if he was looking for some indication of weakness, of anything that would allow him to seize an advantage. You're such a paranoid fool, Alessandra. "I am nervous, that is all," I told him before rushing out a short addition, "Though I am grateful for what you are doing."
Francesco shrugged calmly, "It is no issue; I am happy to be of service,"
"No, Francesco, I-I," I stuttered, letting out a short exhalation as I gathered my thoughts. Taking his hand, I smiled and finally looked at him properly, though my cheeks did burn as I had thought. How could they not when a man such as he looked at me as if I was the only woman in the world? Even Henry of France had not done such a thing. "This is a great risk and I know that you need not do it. I am thankful; paticularly as my brother's wrath si something no man would wish upon themselves."
"I am a Pazzi; I'm used to Medici anger." His quick-witted nature earned a short giggle from myself, but I couldn't escape the truth of his words. And soon enough, I too would be in that predicament. Forsaking my family, forsaking France, perhaps even forsaking myself. For a marriage to a man who only did so to save me from breaking a vow. I would be a Pazzi -- arguably the greatest crime to committ against Lorenzo, especially without his consent. But I am his elder, I reminded myself, and a dowager Queen does not take orders from her younger siblings.
"I wish it was not so," I admitted, feeling his thigh brush against mine as he turned to face me properly. "I believe the animosity between our families should be a thing of the past."
"Then that is what we will strive to do," He responded, squeezing my hand lightly. I had been so caught up in him I had forgotten he had a hold of it, my rather sweaty palm tight against his own. "As husband and wife we could.." He trailed off, shaking his head.
"You're the tense one now," I teased. And, God, he was. His jaw twitched and the grip on my hand became somewhat tighter as Francesco grew vulnerable. "What is it?"
"It is odd to refer to you as my wife."
"I'm not, yet," I said with a breath, glancing around us. An illicit meeting in the darkness of night was arguably the most illicit way we could've went about this. His face was illuminated by the burning torches that stood proudly on the walls of the Florentine buildings and his cloak only reminded us of precisely what time it was.
"But you soon will be," He reminded me, looking away. "It is but a few hours until.."
"Until I am yours and you are mine."
It took that comment for him to look back to me with a tense look. Was it fear? Was it trepediation? I could not tell. He was a man whose expressions always seemed so unreadable, so pensive. Francesco was the type of man to stand in the corner of the room and survey all those around him, calculating their every move. But he was also a kind man. He had to be. For he had shown it to me time and time again.
Nonetheless, I could not help but question Francesco's motivation. Was it truly because he felt something, that he knew was unrequited? Was it out of friendship? I felt sure it had to be something more.. more sinful. Perhaps not lust, no, but something tied to the Pazzi hatred of my family. I did not feel I was worth the consequences of this marriage and, yet, here he was, offering me a salvation. But at what price?
"You're tense again," Francesco commented once more, breaking my stream of thought. I sighed and nodded, acknowledging my state of mind.
"Francesco, if you do not wish to do this.." I trailed off, feeling a frown pull at my lips. "I cannot help but fear that-"
He did not cut me off with words, but with an action that would be considered wholly sinful if we were not to be married. I was grateful he'd done it; our conversation was not much to be envied and filled with an air of anxiety. As he let go of my hand, he put his own upon my cheeks and pulled me close, into a kiss that would remind me of him, throughout all my remaining days.
It was gentle, at first. As if to reassure me of his intentions, of his kindness - though I knew that there was some lustful aspect to it as he took his right hand from my cheek and trailed it down my back, pulling me closer into him. And in truth, though sinful -- and likely wrong -- though it was, I returned it. There was some small sentiment within me that felt appreciative, perhaps even attracted, to him. That was no surprise - he was a handsome man. But this didn't feel like some simple lust that any woman could feel, but the kind I had felt all those years ago when I had first met Francis. God knows I hadn't loved the man but I had found comfort in his presence.
It seemed possible that I could now find that same comfort in Francesco.
"Does that confirm my intent to you?" He asked as he pulled away, keeping his intense gaze directly on me. Francesco remained close to my face, allowing his breath to travel down my neck. It was a.. intimacy that I had only ever had with another; Henry. But this was different. This was not some longforned love that was now erupting, but a kindness, an affection, though more so on his side than mine, that he had shown me.
"I..." I was speechless. I knew not what to say until I felt an audacious comment enter my mind. If we were to be married, it would not be wrong to say it. If anything, I believed it would rather entice him. "You may have to confirm it again, Francesco. Just for.. surety."
A smirk graced his lips and a small chuckle exited, his breath quickening as he did so. I had not yet met his eyes, feeling that my cheeks would burn ablaze if I did so. "I have little issue with that."
"Then," I began, my breatch hitching as I finally looked up to meet his gaze. Those eyes had always hid something within them, but I did not know it then quite what is was. "I think some confirmation is all I need, Pazzi."
He pursed his lips a little as he eyed me, a darkening lust growing in his eyes. "Obliged, Medici."
