I'm your present from your past

Words

Deanna

I drown my self in tears,cold beer at my side and uhmmmm...... with the fucking picture of my girl wearing nothing in her upper body and a bastard lying in her side.

Uggggggggghhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!

I almost broke everything fragile inside our condo kulang nalang pati ang glass door sa may veranda e buti nalang at hindi ko kayang buhatin at ihagis yun palabas kundi  kanina pa ako napalayas dito sa condo namin.

After luigi leaving me yesterday nothing changed my feeling,nakatulog ako oo pero yung bigat at galit andito parin sa puso ko.

Nothing change me mas lumala pa nung nakita ko ulit ang mga picture na nagkalat sa sahig,picture na bumungad sa pintuan ko ng kaaga aga,i wondered did luigi notice it dahil nagluto sya para sa akin impossibleng hindi nya ito nakita.And maybe she grab one kasi nawawala yung picture na nasa labi nya yung labi nung tarantadong lalaking yun.

Luigi knows na magagalit ako pag may ginalaw syang mga gamit ko buti nalang at hindi nya pinakialaman itong mga nakakalat sa sahig ko.

I still admire luigi he knows how to respect my privacy despite that we know each other well for a very long time.

I grab another can of beer and open it..this is my 6th can this morning but my tolerance working hard right now ni ultimo hilo wala akong nararamdaman partida walang kain walang tulog,putok ang labi at ohhh may bukol pa ako sa noo na gawa ni luigi kahapon.

I scroll social media pampalibang lang sa sarili.

Well siguro naman wala ng lakas ng loob pang bumalik yung manlolokong girlfriend ko.

I open another pack of chips and started chewing it when my eyes captured a photo of me and jema.

Hayss its a wrong choice..i should starts deleting our picture together i should start deactivating my social media account.I should start rebuilding my own happiness in life without having her in my bucket list.

I proceed to my gallery and marked all our picture together without any hesitation.

Marked all✔

Delete all?✔

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824/3015..................

1002/3015......

F*** do i need to do this... my other side of mind says

Yes deanna you should...its time to move on..! the other side shout

fine!!!! Its time to look forward...

Tototttt.....tototttttt.....

Warning!!

Your phone will shut down in 5 seconds.

For pete sake pati ba naman battery ng phone ko pagtataksilan ako..wala pa ako sa kalahati pero nagshut down na. I was forced to stand up and look for a charger but when im about to stand bigla akong na out of balance natumba at tumama ang katawan ko sa isang upuan na kaninang naihagis ko.

Ughhh baby..look what are you doing to  me... tumatawa ako habang umaagos ang mga luha ko sa mata

Sabihin mo naman oh...na panaginip lang lahat ng ito kasi ansakit sakit na eh.. my eyes getting blurry dahil sa luhang tuloy tuloy na umaagos dito.