running ✽ donah

fifteen

i wanted to run,

but i forced myself to stay.

our eyes met, my boring blue ones meeting the most beautiful brown eyes i've ever seen.

"you're back," he let out a soft chuckle, his gaze falling to the ground.

"yeah."

"thank god. i didn't know what i was gonna do if you never came back."

i wanted to tell him that i loved him.

but i didn't.

because despite him denying it, he is the most perfect person on the planet.

and i'm just me.

i don't want to hurt him.

i don't want to get hurt.

--

"i don't want to be your rebound."

the words rang through my mind, each syllable echoing as i mentally replayed the sentence in my head.

"what?" it felt like the room was spinning.

"don't use me to get over tate. she was perfect. you're perfect. i don't deserve you," i opened my mouth to speak, but he continued. "i used to tell myself that maybe we could be together, maybe i was good enough for you, and you say always that i'm such a good person but i'm definitely worse than you, and-and this," he motioned between us "won't work."

"i don't understand," my voice was barely a whisper now.

"i-i have issues that you can't fix, and i have to stop setting myself up for heartbreak," he tugged on a strand of his beautiful, soft blond hair.

"i can help you," i tried.

"i can't do relationships, jo. it'll just be a neverending cycle of me shutting you out and letting you back in and just constantly messing with your head. you don't want me, trust me."

with every word, i felt my heart break a little bit more. not for me, but for him. he is one of the most stunning, kind-hearted, funny people on the planet and he is convinced that he is a terrible person.

"why do you even try, jo?"

and then it felt like time stopped. do i tell him?

"because i love you."

i could practically see his brain processing the three words i just said.

those eight letters.

so i kissed him.

again.

and i felt my heart soar.

and when i pulled away,

nothing.

so i pushed past him, tears threatening to fall.

"wait."

i turned, expecting to hear some sort of self deprecating comment from him.

"i love you too."

the end.