Never ending abuse

Poem nine: Lost

Another day of life by the drop.

I pray to lord, help me stop.

I awake in pain, feeling shame.

Knowing soon again I'll play the game.

For the brief second with my self.

Before I walk over to that shelf.

I stop and think of all the things I do.

And the people I hurt while drinking booze.

I grip the bottle o' so tight.

I won't let go until the night.

All these thoughts rush through my head.

Loves and pride and things I once said.

I know it's from the former me.

The one that can no longer be.

It hits me hard, I cannot cope.

So drink until I start to choke..

Day to day, I live like this.

High to high and kiss to kiss.

I hope one day, the drunk will let me out.

And never again will I drink and shout.

Until that time I'll drown and hate.

I just hope that's not my final fate.