You are my god for when you commanded that I'd make the the sky as blue as the sea and with all my love, in an instant it lightened to match the brightness of your smile. When you told me to make the oceans as fierce yet as passionate as a meadow of sharp grass a windy spring day, I did so without a single moments of hesitation, I made a pure dark black into It's deep marine. And when you finally got the world you sought and realized you no longer needed me, you still stood and held me closer and whispered in my ear "Now that everything is together , we can live in this moment what feels like eternity and relish in each frame as it passes" and in the singular millisecond it took to lock eyes with you I knew that this was my destiny. It took everything We built together was meant to be our destiny... Or so I thought
There are times where I feel like you stabbed me and you're telling the world you're bleeding and I wouldn't be crying because of you , You're not worth it I'm crying because my delusion of who you were was shattered by the truth of who you really are. Love doesn't die a natural death. It dies because we don't know how to replenish it's source. It dies of blindness , errors and betrayals. It dies of illness and wounds. It dies of weariness , witherings of tarnishing. The demons are talking they're saying "Right now,I'm letting you live. And I'll continue to keep you alive until you've grown enough to be become worthy of killing" What hurts the most is knowing that for years a person trusted was not honest with you and pretended everything was fine while planning on breaking your heart
I've losing hope in you , I'm losing hope in me Not only that. But things I see and what I read.
I've lost hope in the sky and the stars. The whole world in entirely. The dreams that once were all I could see. I no longer feel free. I'm losing hope in all that made me. ME I don't feel like I can manage to hope or to dream. I'm just starting to not believe in you anymore. Because I'm no longer believing in ME. It's like the future is fading, just out of our reach. Or maybe. There just wasn't one waiting for me. Maybe just like the stars, that future fade a long time ago. And it's only now that I can see, the road I'm on now will lead me nowhere entirely... betrayal from a beautiful bond , a bond which was beautiful I tried to sustain for a life long. But those five unexpected words made nothing less than hell. Words which depressed me a lot where it was so hard to stop the rolling tears around but was so hard to break the bond and so my wisest decision was to never interfere in anyone's life and play a role at any cost even thought they are my precious ones. But what kind of stupidity that I have that I still can't stop myself from wishing about the best for them. But now I can't write as much as I use to write for them before, the words about your beautiful are now been replaced by the words about your betrayal so hard to expect just a real person from someone ...The crazy thing about being betrayed is, you don't lose trust in anyone , you begin to doubt whether or not you can trust yourself, your judgement,and emotions. You get bit by a snake and wonder how can't you see it coming. So you blaming love for having you blind. You start resenting your heart because it forced you to feel. You start shutting down more and more each day until even the best parts of you become bitter. And you begin to wonder... "why hurt me when I tried to mend your wounds?" "Why my heart not enough ?" You ask and ask but none of the answers ever makes sense. Until it finally clicks. You realize because you treated people right, doesn't mean they won't do right by you,and just because your truthful doesn't mean you aren't getting lied to. You watch your friends jump to relationships to relationships, losing their souls forcing themselves to love. And you see people who you thought you knew acting out of character just so people can find them impressive. So then you smarten up and learn not to let selfish people surprise you. You learn not to let users upset you. You learn how to let liars go and fakers fail.And you stop , and you thank god for growth. The kind of helps you accept and see things clearly... Some people make themselves easy to cut off , no need to get angry if their actions , just thank them for saving you time.
