I'll Stay With You (KuroTsuki One Shot)

I'll Stay With You

Ah, it was time for summer volleyball camps to start.

Tsukishima had been hearing Takeda-sensei muttering his thanks for the nth time to Nekomata-sensei and the other coaches for letting them join the camp since the 1st day.  The games during the 2nd and 3rd day was a bit harsh for their team since they’ve been doing penalties for every loss they gain.

It was the 4th day today, and during daytime they’ve played Nekoma for 3-4 times. To be honest Tsukishima find it very awkward whenever he rotates up front and there he stood with Nekoma’s captain, Kuroo Tetsurou. He finds the man good-looking, but the way he looks at him is a bit unnerving. Like a cat watching its prey.

Tonight, in their sleeping quarters, the team was rowdy as ever. Except Tsukishima.

He had been suffering from out of the blue panic attacks for a long, long time. During middle school, he was diagnosed with panic disorder. Every now and then, he would experience it but most of the time he did, he would found himself in a cold, dark place and stay hidden from everyone until it stops.

He wanted to keep it a secret from everyone in the team (except from Tadashi of course, that olive-hairred boy had known him for so long it wouldn’t take him forever to keep it as a secret), but Kageyama accidentally found him in the equipment room, almost out of breath and shaking. The setter immediately ran to him and asked him if he was alright, and as much as embarassing it was, all he could do was cry in front of Kageyama.

He still appreciated the thought that Kageyama was rubbing his back and muttering encouraging words during that time. And it didn’t take a long time for the whole team to know, because a week after that incident, all of them had an open forum and  was obliged to tell the team about certain things he didn’t want to talk about. But after that, he felt lighter and relieved that everyone did not took it negatively and instead encouraged him to be open about it.

And now, the way how his fingers shake bothered and pissed him off at the same time. His brows furrowed and met before a sigh escaped from his lips. He heard Hinata yelled ‘UNO!’ before Kageyama followed a grumble.

He stood and walked towards Sugawara’s futon. “Suga-san, I’ll go out for a breather tonight,” Tsukishima lowly said. He immediately saw concern in Sugawara’s eyes.

“Tsukishima, are you alright? Is it another attack?” The silver haired beauty asked. Tsukishima wanted to tell the truth, but the voices in his head screamed at him to lie.

“…No, I think I’ll just stay out for a while. I can’t get a proper rest with all those idiots running their mouths,” he said. Sugawara nodded, and letting him go. In the corner of his eyes, he saw Tadashi eyeing him.

In a flash, he hurriedly took off from the quarters, without saying a word to the others. He could feel the blood coursing throughout his body to boil hot. Tsukishima lifted his hands in front just to see that the shaking has become violent. His vision also started to get blurry, and his mouth opened slightly to gasp for breath. He walked faster, trying to look for a place to stay, until he felt his shoulder collided with someone’s.

“I’m sorry,” Tsukishima’s voice sounded albeit raspy and low as he apologized. He quickly turned left only to find a stack of boxes. Ah, his safe place. Tsukishima did not waste anytime, and sat behind the boxes. He didn’t mind how the floor got colder every second that passed, but he just want this to stop.

Tsukishima felt pathetic. Even with the help of the moonlight that passed through the window, he could not see anything but a blur. He bit his lips as a sob tried to escape from his lips, but his eyes had betrayed him. Tears started to drop, and he was feeling lightheaded. He leaned his head back in the wall, as his sobs made his shoulders tremble violently. He want this to stop, but he could not do anything. He felt weak, and all the efforts he would do, will eventually go to waste.

The coldness of his hand faded when he felt someone hold it tight. Warmth spreaded throughout his pathetic form when someone’s lips touched the back of his hand. He brought his eyes in front to look at his savior, and it was none other than Nekoma’s Captain.

Even in a blur, he saw how Kuroo gave him a small smile. Not a smirk, nor the shit-eating grin he used to show everyone during the volleyball match, but a soft smile.

“Don’t worry. I’m here. I’ll stay with you,” he heard Kuroo say softly, before giving the back of his hand another kiss. Tsukishima’s eyes started to water again, but he felt no more shaking at all.

He nodded back at Kuroo, before closing his eyes and let himself cry. Tsukishima felt Kuroo’s hand wiped his falling tears away, and he felt like he was going to melt. How did this man find him at this hour, he don’t know. But all he knew was that he was thankful he appeared.

Tsukishima closed his eyes, as he started to calm down. Sobs still escape his lips, but he was eventually pulled into Kuroo’s arms for an embrace. Tsukishima buried his face on Kuroo’s chest, and he could feel his worries being washed away.

“Are you alright now?” He heard Kuroo ask. The man’s lips rested on the top of his golden locks, and his hands were rubbing his back, comforting him.

“Thank you,” was all Tsukishima could reply. He did not want to break off from this man’s arms, nor this moment to end. “How did Kuroo-san…”

“Yamaguchi texted me. We were texting buddies you know,” Kuroo replied. “He said that ‘Tsukki was acting strange, can you please check on him when he goes out of our quarters’. I was on my way when I saw you walking and bumped to me.”

“So it was Kuroo-san who I…”

“Yep. Anyways, I stayed a bit further before following you here. And guess what Tsukki,” Kuroo said.

Tsukishima would have retorted back about how Kuroo said ‘Tsukki’, but he didn’t anyways. He loved the feeling of his chest on his face, and his smell is just very calming. “…Hmmm…What?” He replied.

“Seeing you in that state a few minutes ago broke my heart. It’s very painful for me to see my Tsukki experiencing this feeling. That’s why I immediately went and held your hand tight,” Kuroo said, in a voice Tsukishima could not recognize.

Does… Kuroo like him?

“Whatever the reasons were, I hope you could tell me someday… Over a date perhaps?” Tsukishima felt Kuroo’s chest rumble in a low laugh.  He did not reply, but instead buried his face deeper on this man’s chest and smiled. He heard him chuckle once again, before he found himself being pulled into an abyss of endless darkness to sleep.

“Good night, Tsukki.” Kuroo rested his lips on top of Tsukishima’s head before going to sleep himself.

The following day, the rumors “a cat was seen holding a crow in its arms” spreaded like wildfire.