I dont know stop asking me questions

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I found her


Finally I found her


That girl I've been writing about


The one I've been missing

I found her insta gram




I also found a feeling




I felt relieved



She's here


I felt

Sad

I was missing her

I felt


Angry

I was so late

I felt

Empty


As if all my missing

Pain

Grievance and sorrow


Was for nothing


Like it was justified


I felt

Scared


What if


She doesn't even remember
Me




When I felt

Love

And I missed her

Every single day

Not one damn day went by

I didn't think of her

She brought everything

Lively into my life



She gave me hope


She took it with her



She's grown just as beautiful as the last time I saw her


I don't want her



It reminds me

Of a scene in a film

Annalise keating tried for years to have a child

One was finally surviving

Till it was killed in a car crash

The doctors let her hold her dead baby
For as much time she needed to

And right after the picture she pushed him away

It was unexplainable

That feeling

That Annalise had

I have towards Marley

I don't want her but I wanted her

I want her so bad

But I'm empty at a loss

I don't know

What this feeling is

I can't explain it

And I sure as hell

Don't like it

I'm

I don't even know anymore

I feel fragile

I need my back against a wall to support me


Move me

Some one
please
come rip me out of this
fragile
shell



I don't even know if I want her now that I have her


God



What the hell is
wrong with me


I felt

so much

For her

I felt

Trapped in the emotions


It has me wondering

Did she ever think of me again



Of course she doesn't remember me

I'm never on peoples minds

Not like their on mine





She never looked back did she




Yup



She didn't





It was
Just

A childish

Naive

Wish


Hope

That she ever could've cared


About


A

Weird


Thing

Like me


I'm

So
Stupid




I

Always


Ruin

It


It

Was right

What an old friend

Said long ago




"No one could ever like you"




She was
damn

right

But then
Again

My childishness

It always gets the best of me


What

In the hell

Was I thinking

She could never love me

No one will ever love me

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