How a Heart Unbreaks (#Wattys2019)

Chapter One

Run, run, run.

I kept repeating my one-word mantra. Trying to drown out all the voices in my brain.

Running and ruining. That's what I did best.

You have to learn to forget .my mother said. Move on

One year had passed, since he was taken from me. But it still feels as fresh as yesterday. He was only seventeen. Too young to die. All because of me.

Not only did I lose him, but I lost the only part of him that was left with me in this world. When I lost our baby, I gave up. I had no reason left to live. Without them, I was nothing. A hollow shell of a person.

My suicide attempt, left my parents heartbroken. They tried to help me however they could, but the pain of loss overcame everything else. I stopped living a long time ago. Now I just exist.

Tonight, mom tried to get me out of the house to do some shopping. As last time I had bought a piece of clothing for myself, was for his funeral. I was finally learning to forget.

But I guess my past will never leave me alone. In the mall I saw his mom and his little brother. That was it for me. All wounds were reopened. Instead of facing them or talking to them, I ran. Like the coward I was.

And right now I was running to the one person, who I could talk to. Who really knew me. Aaron.

The gates of the graveyard creaked open, as I pushed against it's rusty hinges. His grave was along the far end of the yard, with a bush of purple wildflowers growing near it. As I reached it, I brushed off the dried flowers, from when I came last time and plucked a few wildflowers from the bush and sprinkled them onto his grave. Tracing my fingers over the letters of his name, I started talking, "I'm not gonna ask dumb questions like 'you missed me' or not. I have no clue what you're doing up there, but I can tell you I wish everyday , that I was up there with you.

"You know, it's funny how they still try to keep me alive, because as far as I know, I died the day our baby died. They don't get the fact, that I don't wish to live. They think I'll move on, find someone else. They say that you'd want me to be happy. It's ironic how they still don't know, the only thing that could make me happy is you, Aaron James.

"I don't wanna bore you or anything, I'll shut up for a while. But is it okay if I stay here a while longer?" I asked, though I knew he won't answer.

I put my head against the cold marble of his grave and cried silent tears.

"You shouldn't," a voice said from somewhere in the shadows. It was pretty late at night and the made shivers go down my spine.

"Who the hell are you?" I asked in a rude tone. He had no right to listen in, to our conversation.

"I'm just saying that if you sit here, he won't be able to rest. You'll be disturbing him. Trust me, I know a guy needs his sleep."the voice said.

"How dare you listen in on our conversation! It was supposed to be private." I said to him.

"Well, I didn't know that. I have ears, and I was standing here. So I kinda just accidentally heard the whole thing." He explained. By now, I knew it was a male voice.

He came out of the shadows, with a cigarette in hand. When he saw me staring at the cigarette, he quickly dropped it and stomped on it with his shoe.

I stood up, dusting the grass off my jeans, not even bothering to look at the guy's face. Before I could leave, his voice stopped me. A husky voice.

"Where're you going?" He asked.

"I don't need to tell you."I said.

"I bet you don't wanna go home, because the people you came running from are probably out there. So your best option is to stay here, until everyone at your house goes to bed." He said.

I hated to admit it, but he was right. I really didn't want to go back home. I looked up at his face. Properly, for the first time. In the dark, I could only make out that he had dark hair and a pale complexion. Even then, I could tell he must be good-looking, in a scary kind of way. Realising that I was staring at him, I quickly looked away and began walking. I made my way to the back of Aaron's grave and sat leaning on to it.

The grass shifted, indicating that he sat beside me, now. I didn't understand, why he wouldn't leave me alone to wallow in my sadness like everyone else did?

"Give up. I'm not gonna talk to you."I said.

"Nope. I can't do that. Look,I know you're sad and all. But, I think you should never leave sad people alone, it only makes it worse."he explained.

I still didn't speak.

"So, what's your name?" He asked.

"You can talk to people without knowing their name." I said, sounding uninterested.

"God, you're testing my patience Suicidal Graveyard Girl. I'm trying here." He sounded genuinely frustrated.

"You don't need to try. I'm hopeless."I said.

"No you're not."he said simply.

"And by the way, 'Suicidal Graveyard Girl'? Nice nickname you found there." I taunted.

"What was I supposed to do? You wouldn't tell me your name."He said.

"I'm only saying this once, so keep your ears open. It's Avril." My name sounded dry from my lips, maybe because I hadn't introduced myself to someone in a year.

He didn't say anything.

"You know, it's very rude not to say your own name, when someone introduces themselves."I said.

"You made me ask for your name. Now, you have to ask for mine."He said.

Oh, so now he was being demanding. I didn't need to know his name that badly.

"I'm not gonna ask. You can live with your ego."I said as I stood up. I didn't need to sit here and entertain him.

"Stubborn. Suit yourself." He said, just as a ray of moonlight caught his face. His eyes were a light honey colour. I looked away turning on my heel, before I could decide I wanted to stay.

"It's Darien." He said to my retreating figure.

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