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You told me not to cry when you are gone
But the feeling is overwhelming is much too strong.
Can I lay by your side, next to you
And make sure your alright
I'll take care of you,
I don't want to be here if I can't be with you tonight
Can you hear my call
This hurt that I've been through
I'm missing you, missing you like crazy
Is life really only what happens when we're making plans?
And they had so many of them... So many shared dreams... So little time together....
But the worst was the regret. Worse than fear and misery. The idea that if she had left her parents opinions behind, if she had just woken up on his arms, kissed him and got in the boat without hesitation they'd be in open sea, being happy and not on the way to the hospital, burned inside her like an angry flame.
The lifeguards had tried laying her down on a stretcher as well but she was screaming so much and so upset they let her into the ambulance with them, holding Can's hand the whole time.
He was pale, half of his face covered in blood, the cut in his head open like a mouth, still bleeding. His lips had lost all color and were slightly blue. He hadn't recovered consciousness yet and the lifeguards talked about a pulmonary contusion.
They placed an oxygen mask on his mouth and nose and a catheter on his arm and on the way to the hospital Sanem could do nothing but shake and cry, running a hand over his arm, thinking about how such a big man looked to fragile and small in that moment.
They were separated on arrival and Sanem really thought she was going to go crazy. She had the wrong idea that when he had left, it had been the peak of her pain but nothing compared to having someone smiling and holding your hand one second and on the next be ripped away from you. It was like having your heart be ripped clean out of your chest.
While Can was rushed on a gurney beyond a swing door, Sanem was taken to a waiting room. A nurse, short and chubby with kind and calm eyes came and knelt in front of her. She got the hands Sanem hadn't even realized were bleeding and on a soft tone of voice that one would use to talk to an injured animal, convinced her to go to a room and have her wounds cleaned in exchange for more information on Can.
While she cleaned the wounds and check if any one them would need stitching, the nurse talked to Sanem to find out if there was someone she could call.
She was stitching the cut on her forehead when Sanem told her about Leyla. She gave the nurse the phone number and let her in charge because she didn't want to spend one more second away from Can.
