Inhale. Exhale.

one

The horizon was perfectly highlighted with the thin ring of the setting sun. The air smelt thick and tough to inhale, as the white of the snow reduced its lustre with the approaching dusk. A light whistle of the air rang in my ears, as I breathed heavily climbing forth, with the dangling of the key-chains on my haversack echoing through the winds. The oxygen was less but the grin on my face wasn't as my hands froze, clicking the most picturesque view of the valley. I shifted my grin towards the back to see the forests stretching its long limbs through the evening, as I put my goggles over my forehead to fill my lenses one last time with the tiny town of Sonmarg.

The path was sturdy but scary as I treaded vigilantly through the deep forests. "If it were for me, I would've already sprinted back home. But Naira? She would run right towards adventure!" I could imagine my Mother's tone in my eardrums with the cold wind as if trying to shove it away so she could stay a little longer in my thoughts. I was walking forth onto the path thinking how amusing it was going to be when I finally reached the rims of Leh after trekking all the way through the revered Zoji La.

I almost stumbled once onto a boulder, trying to distract myself with the wilderness of my musing, as my feet ached with the hour long journey I had decide to start this late afternoon, only to check 'Crossing Zoji La pass at midnight' on my bucket list. The moon shone like a heavy disc in the sky as the midnight heavily embraced the snow clad ranges that wore the clouds like a majestic crown. I was elated and so thankful to the Almighty to be encircled by an enchanting view, as serene as the Buddha himself. I left the shadows of large foliage behind and stepped onto the scantily white roads of the Pass, as I opened my arms open and let out a large scream into the valley to hear it echo throughout the mountain ranges of Zoji La.

Reality hit my face hard, as the gush of wind gave me a goosebump down my spine. I looked at the view and the place around me and decided to rest for a bit. I found a boulder across the path that looked like a giant Shivaling, filtering the moonlight onto its head just to look like Shiva himself had put it there. I put down my haversack and slid down against the stone as my bottom hit the ground hard. I had no idea that the tiny packet of nuts I had packed back in Sonmarg was going to taste this delicious in the middle of the forests at this time of the hour.

My day must have been very exhausting, as I felt weary after taking a small sip of the emergency cognac through its tiny neck. I looked at my surroundings once more as I fell into a light slumber- the one where you are a little aware of your current surroundings but also completely in another realm, because in that realm you are not tired. I had misty visions of my family laughing and the Snow Mountains I was amidst; I dreamt about my Grandmother hysterically asking me to get married alternated with a low sound of an engine growling into the night making the roads dread its passage. Just as I delved deep into my sleep, I felt the ground rumbling and the key- chains on the zippers tingling into the night. I opened my eyes and heard a large vehicle sabotaging its way through the thin Pass- as the earth shook heavily and the branches rustled aggressively into the night.

I did not know what happened faster- the military tank cutting its way through the narrow roads of the area or my heartbeats as I saw large, heavily armed men, get off the armour and run towards me. I got to my feet and collected my belongings to greet them, which seemed like a better option than screaming and fainting. But in no time I was manhandled towards the tank as the men wearing large black outfits covered my head with a dark cloth. I muffled a large scream but this time there was no echo, as my voice was lost amongst the heavy baritone of brutal men and the growling engine of the armoured monster I was being shoved into.

Confusion and fright took over my entire body as my haversack was torn away from me and my arms tethered with a thin material that was cutting through my wrists. With my entire strength, I yelled, "Help please. I am just a tourist. Please let me go!" My jacket was intact but my forehead was sweating heavily as I struggled to breathe through the darkness of the jute that covered my face. Tears rolled down my eyes, as I did not know what fate I would meet. I did not want to die. I did not want my clothes to be torn and be brutally raped by these men. I did not want to feel the pain of my head being cut by a chainsaw. I did not want a bullet through my spine.

Negativity and fear clouded my mind, as I felt a sudden jerk when the cloth that covered my head was pulled. The sweat and tears blurred my vision as I found myself in a large tank with three men covering their face with checked clothes throw a photograph into my face, yelling endlessly and saying, "Aljasus!" I assumed they were asking me to identify the man in the picture and I said nodded my head to say no. "Please leave me. I don't know what you want. I don't know this man in the picture. I am just a tourist." I don't remember how many times I had repeated this but now the fear slithered inside me like twisted snake and coiled harder with every growl of the moving tank.

The sudden jerk into a total stop made me inquisitive as the men wore their guns around their chests and climbed outside the tank. There was commotion and the smell of gunpowder in the air as I crept into a corner, away from the large hole on the ceiling. My wrists stung with the wire holding my arms behind my back and I reached out to my haversack to get hold of something useful to get me out. I paid no heed to the distinct chatter of the men outside as I heard their deep voices walking away from the vehicle.

Just then a large set of gunfire rang in the air, startling me to my guts and making me almost cry with dread and fear. I was gripped with agitation and confusion when a man climbed in through the hole landing perfectly on his feet. He was not in the tank earlier as I analysed his black t-shirt and camo pants. "Ma'am are you alright?", he said in a reassuring voice as he removed a cutter from the pockets and let me loose. I was not aware of who that man was or how he had found me or was I even safe with him, however something about him told me that he would protect me.

His rough large arms helped me up as he threw my bag onto his shoulders. I was helped up into the open air but the air still choked within me as I saw four men lying bloody and dead around the tank. The last thing I remember is his messy hair and his sinewy arms carrying me through the darkness. I had closed my eyes immediately after that and opened it barely once, only to see the man in the black t-shirt shifting gears in some sort of vehicle and worriedly looking at me, when I let out a small moan back into the grips of the darkness.