Stripes

Sleep Walking

I lay awake

hoping it's just a dream

praying this isn't me

for who i've become I'm not proud of.

This shadow walking by

impersonating me

wherever i go

whatever i do

I can't escape 

this sad place

with wrinkled time

and unexcused memories

for this head lay on a pillow softened by

shredded souls 

and sweaty palms

secured by the locks of grace

and hope

and faith.

Deceived by the ones who have done this to me.

Trapping me in an unedifying pit

of misery

and blood.

Blood of the broken and sinful.

Dead upon the shattered soil we walk on.

Unknown by the givers and the takers.

Unwanted by the families and the friends.

Unloved by everyone

and

yourself.

The end rises near

invisible 

broken luck.

blooming with needingness

hiding behind something your not.

Powerful words but weak minds.

Conjuring the ones who need to come back

come back to see what we've become.

Eating away at everything we got.

Noticing the gaps in our cycles,

little

by

little.

Wanting to become something but not wanting to try.

Rules of believing whats not true.

Sparing every last breath.

Not many more.

Too much space.

Too little time.

Writing

reading

knowing

learning.

Nothing prepared us for this.

A new light in the sea of darkness and lost minds.

Trying to get out,

you can't wake up from your nightmare.

Not because your dead but because it's your life.

The blaze of thunder and noise,

up roaring your intentions and thoughts.

Not knowing they can get out.

Downing the chances,

no risks.

Mistakes making you cringe as your beat slows down.

As the world slows down.

Silence.

Darkness.

Peace.