Self Conscious- Destiel

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Third Person

Dean stared at his reflection. How did someone like Cas love someone like him? That was the one thought that raced around his mind.

"How does a person like Cas love someone like me?" Dean asked aloud, louder than he had meant to, but knowing he was home alone, he didn't really care.

That was, however, until he heard footsteps coming through the halls.

'Shit,' he thought, standing up off the floor and wiping the tears from his face. He smoothed out some of the wrinkled that resided in his shirt and breathed out heavily.

Cas, being the sneaky little shit he was, had been standing in the doorway for about a minute at that point, having heard what Dean had said and watching him cry.

"Oh, hey Cas," said Dean, turning around and seeing him in the doorway.

Cas walked into the room without speaking, wrapping his arms around Dean's shoulders tightly, burying his face in the crook of his neck and breathing in the familiar scent.

"Not that I'm complaining, but what's the deal?" Dean asked, wrapping his arms around Cas's waist.

"I heard what you said a few minutes ago, Dean, and I want you to know that I love you. I just don't understand why you don't believe you're worthy of that," Cas said, giving one last squeeze and pulling back.

He took Dean's hand and led him to the bed, sitting down with him. He never let go of his hand as he placed it on his knee and covered his and Dean's hand with his other hand.

"I just," Dean exhaled sharply once again, trying to compose himself before continuing, "I don't understand why you love me. I've yelled at you and gotten angry for no reason. I push you away when things get hard, and with our lives, things get hard every other day (get your minds out of the gutter you pervs) and you deserve so much better than that. I really just don't get it." 

Dean was crying at this point, the tears flowing freely as his body racked with sobs. He leaned over to Cas and put his head against his chest, clutching onto Cas's shirt like his life depended on it. 

Cas removed one of his hands from where they were resting atop his knee and gently combed his fingers through Dean's hair.

"Look at me, Dean," Cas said, tears now threatening to spill as he looked at Dean's flushed face.

"I don't care that you get angry, I don't care that you push me away. I know things are tough sometimes, but at the end of the day, you always come back. You always apologize and I always forgive you. I know that you need me, sometimes even more than I need you. I know that even though you have this war face on all the time, you, along with every other human on this planet, need love. That's what I'm here for, because I need it too, Dean, and you're the only person I want to give it to me. Do you understand now?" Cas said, brushing Dean's tears off his face.

Dean nodded, pulling Cas into another hug, once again sobbing into his shirt as his head rested on Cas's shoulder.

They sat on Dean's bed in each others arms for what seemed like hours, but was merely a few minutes. When they finally pulled apart, Dean's face was a healthy shade of red, but he was no longer crying, instead sporting a small smile.

"You always seem to know exactly what to say. I love you so much," said Dean, his smile growing a little wider.

Cas was the one to close the gap between them, their chapped lips meeting and fitting together like puzzles pieces. 

Pulling away, they rested their foreheads together, allowing small smiles to rest upon their faces as they gazed into each others eyes.

-Time Skip-

That night, after they'd eaten, Gabriel had shown up to steal away Sam's attention for several hours, and Dean and Cas were left alone.

Even knowing what things many people would've done when presented with this opportunity, Cas and Dean laid on their bed, wrapped up in each other's limbs.

Their legs entwined amongst each others, their arms wrapped around each other's waists, their hands carding through the others hair, and their faces showing nothing but pure contentment.

"I think I get it now," Dean mumbled against Cas's neck.

"Get what?" Cas asked softly.

"Why you love me," Dean said, smiling sleepily.

"Good."

Cas cuddled closer to Dean, relishing in his warmth and the fact that Dean was his to love and his to be loved by. He really did love that man.

"I love you, too, Cas."

Cas smiled. He finally found what he was looking for.

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