sue me | joshler ✓

THIRTY FOUR

this fic has 10 chapters left omg i'm SAD. also these last 10 chapters are literally so wild haha

it was the weekend and josh hadn't left his bed once except for school, to eat, and shower. he has barely talked to his family and he felt pathetic. he never knew he could be this sad over a boy. a fucking boy. yet, here he was, laying his bed, crying for 3 third time that day and it was only 4pm.

josh was watching something dumb on netflix because he couldn't bring himself to watch what he usually watches, which was the flash. usually the flash would cheer him up because he loved grant gustin, but, him and tyler watched it together and now all it did was make him cry.

he really missed tyler a lot. sometimes he wish he could just run up and kiss him like they used to do. but, josh knew that wasn't going to happen. he didn't think it would ever happen again. he couldn't forgive tyler for doing something like that to him and hurting him the way that he has.

a tear had falling down josh's cheek and he quietly sniffled to himself. he hated being like this and when he went to his therapist yesterday, it didn't help one bit. he felt like crying the whole time she was talking to him. to say the least, he was excited to get out of there.

"screw this I can't sit here any longer." josh said to himself as he gently moved jim off his lap. he didn't exactly know where he was going yet, but that didn't stop him from grabbing his shower essentials and walking to the bathroom.

he turned on the water and stripped of his clothes. once he stepped into the shower, he let the hot water trickle down his body as he got lost in his thoughts. once he finished up washing his body, he got our and wrapped his towel around himself.

when he walked back to his room, josh went to check his phone and saw that he had yet another text from tyler. he sighed and unlocked his phone

tyler: I miss you.

josh sighed and ignored it and started to get ready. while he was going that, his phone buzzed again. he groaned and picked it up. he was starting to get annoyed.

tyler: I broke up with jenna. I told her everything. I'm sorry josh please. I need you.

his heart lunged and he wanted so bad to text tyler and say that he needed him just as much. but, he didn't. he left him on read and continued getting ready. once he got dressed, he grabbed his keys, wallet, and phone before walking down the stairs.

"where are you going?" laura asked her son.

"out." he simply replied.

"please don't do this josh." she begged him.

"all I said was that I was going out." josh said as he walked out the house without a response. when he got into his car he pulled up his messages and saw that tyler texted again.

tyler: don't leave me on read josh.
josh: stop texting me or i'll block you.
tyler: josh! fuck please i'm so sorry.
josh: you're betting blocked.

josh didn't actually block him but that seemed to work because tyler didn't text anymore after that. he put his phone down and started driving. josh decided on going to the local gay bar downtown because he was 18 and wanted a change of scenery.

when he got there, he showed the man his ID and got an X on his hand before entering the building. the lights in the bar were dim and loud music could he heard from outside. josh saw guys dancing on guys and girls dancing on girls. he let out a shaky breath and made his way to the middle of the floor.

as he approached it, josh didn't really know if he should dance or even attempted to make conversation with anyone, so he walked towards the bar area and sat down on one of the stools.

"can I get you anything?" the bartender asked him.

josh held up his hand showing the X on his hand. "just water. thanks." he told her.

once she gave him his water, he had his hand on his chin and the other was stirring the ice in his glass.

as he was contemplating everything he has done in the past 3 hours, he heard a voice speak behind him.

"I'm guessing you're not 21?" a man with blonde hair asked

josh felt himself blushing and he nodded his head. "yeah i'm only 18. I don't know what i'm doing here." he admitted shyly.

the man sat down next to him. "i'm sure you're here for a reason. what's your name?" he asked him attentively.

"josh." he answered. "what about you?" he asked.

"my names luke. and i'm 21 if you were wondering." he paused and josh laughed and nodded his head.

the man, which josh learned his name was luke, cocked his head at josh before he spoke again. "let me guess? bad breakup?" he guessed.

josh frowned for a bit before nodding. "you could say that." the mentioned responded.

luke gave him a comforting smile. "that sucks. I am so sorry. can I ask what happened? I don't want to be all up in your buisness if you don't want me to." he assured.

"nah it's okay," josh answered honestly. "I was kind of with this guy who told me he broke up with his girlfriend but was lying. he was cheating on her and playing me at the same time."

luke's eyes widened. "what? that's so messed up man. I'm sorry you had to go through that. was he at least cute though?" the other asked with a smile.

josh's head hung low as he nodded slightly. "the cutest."

it was quiet after that and josh decided on something that he was probably going to regret in the morning. he looked up at luke with a smirk. "you live alone?" he asked him.

luke slowly nodded his head. "yeah..? why?"

josh let out a breath before replying. "wanna go back to your house?"

the other looked at josh with a sly smile before taking his hand. "it would be my pleasure."