Emerald Ashes

Miserable

L

Watching Corvo's vehicle rumble away from the hospital offered little comfort. I assured him of my peace with being alone without the safety of his looming presence but I couldn't help but wish I never sent him away. He kissed the top of my forehead and wished me luck with Roddy. Every time he did this - kissed me above my brows, I wanted him to move his lips lower but I never found a way to vocalize my desire. Instead, I stayed quiet and allowed him to do as he pleased without any further requests from me. The warmth that spread from his lips into my skin felt different from when our fingers laced like woven wool. It was a fire that spread slowly. Painfully slow, and branched like lightning striking the earth. A euphoric sensation I couldn't place no matter how much I tried to compartmentalize. I craved the feeling and I knew he did as well. But something deep in my gut stopped me every time my lips parted. I went to speak and my voice dissolved. Particles swirling in front of my unseeing eyes. I watched them float into the sky out of my reach.

"L," a raspy, worn voice called from behind me. I turned on the soles of my feet to face the origin of the sound. A tall figure lit up in a dark maroon stood at the top of the steps leading to the hospital front. "Corvo said you'd be here." Dean took a few steps down toward me and I finished off the distance so we met in the middle.

"Thank you for meeting me. It would be impossible to navigate this place alone." I shook my head at the idea and started up the remaining stairs with Dean in tow.

"My pleasure, and I wanted to speak with you about the MAD in your blood system," Dean said. I stopped and swiveled to face him. Frowning, I turned my gaze up to him and allowed him to finish speaking before I passed judgment on his incessant obsession with the drug. "I know you don't want an exam, or any tests done and I'll respect that but L," he said with a head shake. "Roddy had some pretty bad side effects last night. His system is pretty much clear now but I'm worried about you."

"What happened?" I asked.

"He had a pretty high fever, started scratching at the wound on his leg, and hallucinations all through the night," Dean said. I paused, swallowing at the thought of going through those same side effects. The open wound on my stomach ached as phantom fingers scratched at the sidewall. Blood soaked through the makeshift bandage Corvo reapplied a new one this morning but thankfully the dark shirt camouflaged the darkening bloodstain.

"I'll be fine," I lied and started into the building. The automatic doors slid to the side and I stepped through the passages while Dean walked a few steps behind me.

"You don't have to put on a brave face here, L," he said. His voice barely reached me but when it did I chuckled to myself. A smile hinting on my lips but I didn't let it form. "You're allowed to be scared."

"I'm not," I gulped and kept walking. Dean caught up with me and rested a hand on my shoulder to guide me through the maze of hallways connecting the hospital wards into the central administrative area. We branched off toward the inpatient department. The harsh smell of alcohol and lemon-flavored cleaners assaulted my nose in heavy waves. I wrinkled my nose in protest but the smell just trickled around the blockage.

"Intense," I muttered. Dean hummed next to me but didn't respond. His grip on my shoulder loosened and his pace slowed. We stopped in front of an open doorway, and Roddy's voice filled my ears.

"I'm fine, I don't need anything else," he argued with someone in the room.

"Roddy," I interrupted and rushed into the room without thought to who he spoke to. His attention immediately flickered to me as soon as I made myself visible. Dean followed and went to the other side of the bed. He busied himself with Roddy's vitals and levels.