tuan 개? | markjinson ✔️

3.

it has been two months since then, the six boys had gotten closer. sticking around each other whenever possible, hell, they are even deciding on moving in into jackson's house. the six gave up studying and decided to pursue other things like music, fashion and others. jackson and mark forgave each other, made up, and started dating. though a big part of himself still loves jinyoung, but he realised he also loved mark. he was basically in conflict.

that night when the five boys decided to move in, mark laid on his bed. he felt like the relationship was missing something, or more of someone. it was quite the same then. the scene from prom kept playing in his mind, screwing up his emotions. his inner demons coming out, blaming him for wrecking a perfect relationship.

"he's just dating you cause he pity you."

"you'd never make up as good as jinyoung, that's why he never did look at you didn't he?"

"you're not good enough"

"you suck"

thoughts like this kept flooding his mind. he couldn't scream nor could he run away from it. he ran to his attached bathroom, took out his razor and started violently drag it down his wrist. blood dripping down his arm, but he was numb to the pain. hoping to release his frustration and overwhelming emotions taunting him, he did more, this time he went deeper.

hearing muffled screams, jackson barged into mark's room and ran into the bathroom when he realised that mark was not in the room. seeing the blood flowing from mark's wrist, he quickly grabbed the razor from the elder's hand, accidentally cutting himself while doing so. he threw away the razor and hugged a sobbing mark, comforting him as he cried.

soon the muffled crying became sniffles, then to soft snores. taking that time, jackson cleaned himself up and bandaged his palm as well as mark's wrist. "why do you and jinyoung cut yourselves. it hurts me seeing you hurt yourselves." jackson mumbled. when he was done, jackson made sure to kiss the bandaged wrist and hope for a fast recovery without infections. he then carried mark to his bedroom and tucked him in, letting mark be surrounded with the smell of jackson, himself.

"is mark hyung okay?" yugyeom asked just as jackson walked into the kitchen. "yea but not quite." jackson replied, and followed through with what happened in mark's room. he then declared that mark would share room with him from then on.

pulling jackson aside, jaebum questioned, "what would do if u found jinyoung?" jackson shrugged. it was the truth, he couldn't choose. he really couldn't. "if that happens, do what best for the three of you okay?" jaebum pat jackson's shoulder and left with youngjae, bambam and yugyeom following suit, after shouting "night hyung, love you"

jackson sighed, as he took a glass of water, sipping while thinking of that jaebum had said.

"hey babe" mark whispered, snapping jackson out of his thoughts. "mark hy-" "no formalities between us please" mark cut the younger off. "okay...what are you doing out of bed?" jackson asked. "to get a glass of water dummy." mark chuckled waving an empty cup in front of jackson, causing the latter to chuckle.

"thanks for saving me from myself just now" mark thanked quietly. jackson backhugged him, "don't worry babe. i love you i really do". mark turned around, "do you really though? what about jinyoung?" then, jackson sighed. "you love him too don't you mark?" "i-" "its okay, let's go sleep. we'll find him soon"

with that the duo went to bed. the house became quiet, but it wasn't so peacefully nor does it feel completed.