Gravity Falls Lost Legends: Pines Triplets Edition (Original Version)

Comix Up

"Have you ever seen a baby that looked old? Like, an old baby?" Mabel asked her siblings as she sat on the couch on the outside porch. She was using Waddles as a pillow as well.

"I once saw a baby with an old man's face on TV if that counts" Mara replied from next to her, so bored she didn't even bother to turn her head.

"Welp, we've officially run out of things to talk about" said Dipper, who was hanging upside from the couch next to Mara.

He sighed disinterestedly.

"If only there was a way to go on an adventure without getting up or tilting my neck."

As if on cue, Soos suddenly pulled up next to them in his old pick-up truck; the back of it filled to the brim with cardboard boxes.

"Who wants a truckload of comic books?" He called out.

All three of the triplets sat up eagerly.

"Whaa?"

Soos took one of the cardboard boxes into the Mystery Shack gift shop, and started to open it.

"Abuelita's filling my closet with her creepy porcelain angels, so I need a place to keep my comic collection" he explained, as the triplets peered into the box earnestly. "Enjoy, dudes!"

Dipper was sitting on the hardwood floor reading a comic book with a red cover.

"Whoa, adolescent power fantasies!"

Mara was lying on her stomach, with her comic book lying flat on the floor in front of her.

"Dark antiheroes with ambiguous morals!"

Mabel was lying on her back, holding her comic in the air.

"Pretty men in prettier tights!" She grinned, as she reached over towards a tube of white-out lying on a nearby table.

"And with a little white-out, you can fix boring dialogue!" She said, as she opened the bottle and started to paint white liquid over entire paragraphs. She started making her own corrections with a thick pink maker:

"Egad! My face is 90% chin!"

"I'll never punch away my loneliness!"

Mabel snickered.

"Ha ha! Eisner award, here I come!"

Suddenly, Stan burst into the room, apparently enraged to find everyone lying on the floor reading comics.

"Bah! So called comic-books are dumb rags for babies and the perpetually unemployed!" Stan said crankily. "Soos! Load these into the bottomless pit!"

"But Mr. Pines, comics are a legitimate artistic medium!" Soos tried to argue. "Like easter egg painting or rodeo clowning!"

"Balderdash!" Stan exclaimed. "Words and pictures are an unholy union!"

"Like chicken and waffles" Mara said.

Mabel narrowed her eyes at her.

"Debatable."

"Besides, these goof-em-up rags just distract the employees" Stan continued, pointing at Wendy. "Look!"

Behind the counter, Wendy was busy reading a Blarchie edition, not even paying attention to the rest of them.

"Ha ha. Oh, Blarchie. Who needs a personality when you have freckles" she said aloud.

That was Stan's last straw.

"That's it!" He exclaimed furiously, bending down to snatch up the large pile of comics. "I'm hiding these wacky pages before they convince you to go to art school!"