dear yoongi,
remember when we fought back in 2nd grade? i hid your lunch and you got so angry that you decided to stab me with a scissor? that shit hurted bro. it's not even that deep but you still owe me an apology because that shit really hurted!
remember back in fourth grade? you used to tease me with taehyung so much because you thought i like him. well sucks for you because no, i don't like taehyung. it's you i like.
remember when we reunited back in 7th grade? we havent had a single conversation when i moved back to busan. i had to leave seoul and go back to busan due to some family issues. i spent two years on busan studying my ass off because i want to go back to seoul, back to you.
i remember you looking at me as if it's the first time you've seen me in your life. when in fact it has just been two years since i left. you didn't talk to me for a week until our chairs have been arranged and i get to sit with you. it was fun, hearing your voice and your hand stroking my hair whenever i fall asleep in class.
remember when you had to move schools a year after? i honestly wanted to tell you not to go but you said your mom decided that it would be better for you to transfer. you promised me you'll come again to visit but you never did. i only get to talk to you through chats but never have i seen you visit the grounds of seoul national high school.
remember when you got yourself a girlfriend? i was the one who would always confide with. whenever you two would have problems? we'd always drink your sorrows away. it sucks, for her to just push you away. you should've been with me back then.
remember when i graduated junior high school? you were the first one apart from my parents who congratulated me. i felt so happy, to be able to graduate at the same time as you even though i wasn't with you.
remember when you would always come over and we'll play video games together? you would always buy me takeouts and we'll talk about life after playing video games. i missed that, i missed you.
remember when you told me you wanted to have a partner? in a romantic way because you're tired of being single? imagine how tired i am.
i remember the time when you told me you love me. i remember being flustered it took me a while to regain my sanity and come up with a word to respond.
i remember the day when i had finally acknowledged my feelings for you. no longer i see you as the boy who stabbed me with a scissor back in 2nd grade but a young man who i want to spend the rest of my teenage years with.
i remember wanting to ask you to come over. so we could cuddle and hold hands and talk about our dreams, our dreams.
my dream with you and yours with me.
but then i remember the night when you told me you found the one for you. you found the girl you're willing to spend the rest of your life with. you found that someone who will stay up with you and talk about your passion, your dreams and you finally found the one who gave you the reason to live.
i remember crying my heart out while rereading your messages. remember asking myself why i wasn't enough. remember feeling bad for myself as to i can never give you what you could have asked for i was just a sad boy that has feelings for my best friend.
i should've told you what i felt for you. i should've just manned up and said i like you.
it feels like yesterday when it happened but look at you now, you're finally getting married to the girl you promised forever with.
is it bad that i want to be selfish now? i wanted to but for the sake of your happiness and our friendship, i won't.
i hope you settle in good.
i love you.
jimin closed his laptop and let out a loud sigh. he changed to his sleepwear and sat on his bed. jimin glanced at the clock on his nightstand and it read 12:46am. the same time yoongi messaged him that he had found himself 'the one'
he tucked himself in, closing his eyes for he has to attend yoongi's wedding tomorrow but not before letting the tears that prickling his eyes free.
"i love you, yoongi."
