24. Aquaphobia

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"Behind my eyelids are islands of violence.

My mind ship-wrecked, this is the only land my mind could find." 21 Pilots

Kayla had never known hatred before

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Kayla had never known hatred before.

It was completely foreign to her, an emotion she had never allowed herself to feel. She always tried to believe that there was good in people. That everyone had their own story and reasons for why they acted the way they did.

But looking at her brother now, she realised there was only one word for the emotion that was bubbling up inside her; hatred. He had killed a little girl. He had lied to her, kept secrets from her and now he had killed Noah too. If he had just come clean about what he and Savannah had done, maybe Noah's death could have been avoided.

She was angry at herself for feeling this way, and that made her hate him even more. There was no denying it, the pedestal she had held Ryder on for so long was not only shattered, it was completely obliterated. Turned to dust and blown away by a gust of wind, never to return again.

She watched as Ryder crawled towards Noah's body and fought the urge to push him away. To tell him he didn't deserve to be anywhere near the corpse of the boy he had killed. She stepped backwards to prevent herself from doing so as Ryder picked up Noah's smashed in head and attempted to piece it back together.

As if Noah was a puzzle that Ryder could force back into place.

"Please Noah, wake up." Ryder's sobs filled the room, his hands filled with shards of skull and brain matter. "I'm sorry. Fuck, I'm sorry."

The sight made Kayla's stomach turn uneasily and she felt the bile rise up her throat as more and more blood was smeared on the floor, on Ryder and on Noah's corpse. The sick squelching sound was too much and if she had anything left inside her, she knew she would throw up.

"Stop it man." Aaron had walked up to Ryder and was shaking his shoulder. "It's too late, please stop."

Savannah was retching in the corner, the sound further pushing Kayla's gag reflex to its limits. It was all too much; the sight of Ryder with brain and bone in his hands, the blood congealing on the floor, Savannah vomiting. This had to be a hallucination, it couldn't possibly be real life.

It was the kind of moment that only happened in the worst horror movies, one's that Noah had loved but Kayla had watched between her fingers. It was an all-too-real depiction of a nightmare, bloody and bare in front of her eyes. She couldn't take it, she couldn't handle what was happening. Everything was real, she was somehow immune to the serum.

Noah was dead. Ryder was a killer.

Hate. Blood. Brain. Bone.

Dead.

The call of insanity was tempting. It beckoned to her and whispered sweet nothings in her ear, telling her that everything would feel better if she just embraced it. It tugged at her consciousness and pushed passed her restraints, breaking down her barriers. And Kayla was running out of will power to fight against it.

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