BTWRITES: BLUSH

chapter one

cr. Gertie - kpopinesss

Frankly, it's not the first time I've been disappointed in myself but it's also not the first time I've been annoyed with the world in general so I usually consider this even. And my coach scolding me about being late to practice yet again is just something not out of the ordinary at this point.

"Park Chaeyoung, why must you attend practice so late? As our substitute captain, it's expected by the lot of us that you make it here prepared and on time. And I better not hear your ass got stuck between the kitchen counter and the drawer again."

I cringed at the raised voice of the post prenatal mum who also has to keep a group of wild college girls in check. "Sorry, Coach."

She let out an exasperated sigh before waving me off towards the rest of the squad. "Don't even say sorry. Just don't do it."

I couldn't commit to saying I won't. I was never good at commitment anyway.

So after I had internally reflected on myself for a split second, I walked over towards the rest of the group who stared at me with their fingernails between jittering teeth. I rolled my eyes with an obnoxious smile and joined the rest of the girls sitting crossed position on the gym floor.

"What did Medusa say?" Jisoo glared at me with wide eyes more afraid of my reply than my concerns.

I chuckled lightly and shrugged. "The usual."

All seemed relieved. Like I said, this wasn't my first time.

"Chaeyoung, you gotta start coming here on time!" Jennie retorted through also obnoxious chews of her healthy chocolate bar. "So we can finish early and sneak over to the soccer field. You know they have practice after 5."

I started the pre stretches, seeming to be the last one to do so. "Why do I need to go there again?"

"Because your boyfriend's there." Lisa wiggles her eyebrows at me only to be slapped because of her immaturity.

"We're in college. We're not animals." Jisoo scolded her. "But seriously though, that one guy everyone keeps pairing you with on the school's popularity contest is conducting try outs since Coach Kim's out of town and everyone's going to be there. We are not going to be excluded because of your constant scholarship triathlons."

I sighed. "None of them are even giving me a callback. I haven't heard from a single one.."

The secret to why I was late. To why I'm always disappointed in myself? Because I'm on the other side of the campus with counsellors looking for international scholarships. And I'll never tell them.. not yet at least. That I have a meeting with a dance adviser from Manhattan. That will determine whether or not I get a scholarship.

And I sure as hell am not going to tell them I have no time for love at the moment. Because they know I never did.

"Okay girls. Let's get started."

.

College kids were just like the squirrels. They come here to feed and when they have nothing better to do, they leech off others. If I didn't love my friends enough, I would've called them great examples of that analogy.

We finished practice and were all getting ready to do our off campus activities. But the girls were getting ready to drool over the soccer team and it's newbies. I personally could care less. I already cheer for them. What else do they want me to do?

"They're starting!"

I watched as the rest of the squad piled out the gym doors like a herd of sheep, hurrying to see Park Jimin brutally terrorise the try out freshmen. The girls with me stared with discontent and frustrated anxiety seeing as they wanted me to go too. I wasn't in a hurry at all. In fact I was barely tying up my casual shoes to leave for my dorm. Where I would likely fall asleep from exhaustion. Like a normal college student who wasn't caught up in the affairs of cute boys and what they do for a living.