Feelings

Sleep

The doctor said
"Take these at night, it'll calm the mind and body"
So I took the bottle and help the pills close,
These are my salvation.
These are my new best friend.
These are my poison.

I lay in bed and take the pills,
One by one I feel them sink,
One by one I feel my throat close around them,
One by one I hope for sleep.

It's been two hours and I'm still awake,
Three hours,
Four hour,
Five hours,
I just want sleep.

All I want is for my mind to shut down,
My brain to stop thinking,
My thoughts to stop screaming,
But why would they?

I take another,
I know it's safe to,
But I almost wish it wasn't,
I almost wish that when sleep takes me it will be for the last time.

No more thinking.
No more thoughts.
No more races between my heart and my head.

Pretty pills filling my thoughts,
What if I took another?
What if I took two more?
What if I drank the bottle?
Would I feel the pebbles filling me up?
Would I feel full for the first and last time?

I just want sleep,
I just want peace,
I just want it all to stop.