Tumor Love

- 2 -

The days went by quicker than i wanted them to. And as the days went by, my dad got sicker. He looked worse than ever. It's crazy to think that just a couple of days can do that to a person. But i guess when you're sick, your body speeds up the process on it's own. Killing you from the inside.

Today my mom came with me. Which was nice for a change, usually none of us visits him at the same time. My mom got her work, and my siblings got their own life to live. I'm the only one who seems to be coming here every damn day.

My mom sits beside my dad, holding his hand in hers. I smile a little to myself as i watch them sit there. ''Dawn, can you give your dad and i a moment?'' I mumble a quiet okay and walk out of his room.

His room.. He should be home, not here. This isn't his real bedroom, this was just supposed to be a temporary solution until he got better.

I shake my head, trying to get rid of the thoughts that just can't seem to leave my mind anymore. Walking towards the nurses station i notice a tall guy standing with his back against my sight. Probably just another visitor..

I see Mary sitting at a desk, answering the calls from who knows who. She sends me a smile, as she notice me walking over towards her. I sit down in the chair beside hers, and rest my head against my arms, on the desk. My gaze wanders over to the guy who's still standing with his back turned against me. I don't know why, but it annoys me that i can't see his face.

Almost everyone on this floor of the hospital, is someone i've seen before. Half of the people here leaves with smiles on their faces, while i'm with the other half. The half that ends up leaving in tears, as their loved ones dies. But this guy. This one is new, it almost feels like he doesn't belong here.

Tearing my gaze away from the unknown guy, i look down at the floor instead. If you look close enough, and pay attention you can see a small pattern carved into the floor.

''So, how is your dad?'' I stop looking at the floor, and turn my attention to Mary who's not talking with someone on the phone anymore.

I shrug my shoulders. ''You already know how he is..'' I mumble, i mean. She can just read his chart, and see what the doctors said.

She lets out a heavy sigh, probably sensing my bad mood. ''Dawn.. I know it's hard-

And i zone out, as my eyes finds the guy who once stood with his back turned this way. He's now standing there, already looking over at me. It's him. The perfect guy from a couple of days ago. This time i could actually go over, and touch him if i wanted to. He's here. He's actually here, and not just a part of my imagination as i began to think.

My lips part slightly as he smiles at me. He starts walking this way, almost as if he's going to walk over here. To me, or at least that what i'm telling myself. But he's not he's walking past me, but then he turns his head back. My cheeks heat up, as i realize he just caught me staring after him.

''I see Harry caught your eye'' My mouth opens a little more, and my cheeks burn even more up when i turn to look back at Mary. Not only did he catch me staring at him, but she did too.

''I-..Uh'' I fumble with my words, as i try to come up with an excuse. But Mary just laughs at my poor attempt.

''He's a fine young man, i don't blame you. If i were a young woman i would totally be all over that, and he's such a sweetheart.. Coming here to visit his sick grandmother''

So that's why he's here.. He's visiting his grandmother.

I sit here with Mary for twenty minutes or more, before i walk back towards my dads room. But just as i'm about to grab the door handle, it swings open at me and out comes my mother. In tears.

''Mom what's wrong? What happened, is dad okay?'' The words rush out of my mouth, before i push her aside so i can come into the room.

A chill runs down my spine, as i think the worst thought possible. Is he dead? And then i see him. Alive and well, or as well as he can be. But he's not dead, he's still alive. I quickly blink the tears that had started to form in my eyes away.

And then a wave of anger hits me instead. ''You can't just come out of the room like that!'' I yell at my mom, once i get out in the hallway again.

''Dawn please, not here'' My mom says, as she steps towards me.

''No! You can't just go out crying like that, i-i.. I thought he-'' A tear rolls down my cheek, the one i tried to blink away seemed to escape anyways.

My mom embraces me in a hug, i don't hug her back though. ''I'm sorry, i'm sorry..'' She mumbles into my hair, as she strokes it. ''I.. I'll see you at home okay?'' She kisses my forehead and then i watch her walk away from me.

I slowly walk back into my dads room, trying to escape all the attention i had created. Once i'm in the room, my dad looks at me with sad eyes. It's the look he always gives me when i'm sad, and then he pats the spot next to him on the bed. I bite my lower lip, and sit beside him.

He moves his arms around me, and starts rubbing my back. And so i break down, there's no pretending anymore. Not right now. Sobs escapes my lips, as the tears continues to fall.

''Just let it all out.. It's okay'' And with those words being said, it's like i fall completely apart.

All the months i've spent, with a smile plastered onto my face. All the time i've been holding everything in, because there was no one to talk to about it. I just wanted to be the strong one, that kept everyone together. I thought i could pretend, at least for a little longer.

But i can't.. Being here in my father's arms, just reminds me of the fact that this could be the very last time i get to do this. This could be one of the last times he's here to make me feel better. Soon enough i won't be able to see him, or touch him.

I still have hope, that one day the doctors will burst through the doors. Telling us that they found a cure, just in time so that my dad won't have to die.

After some time, i finally stop crying. ''I'm sorry.. I didn't mean to cry like that..'' I mumble, pulling a bit at the sleeves of my shirt.

''Dawn, you're the only one who hasn't cried about any of this. We all knew this would happen sooner or later''

''I would've prefered later, or never'' I say, while drying my eyes with my sleeve. My dad laughs at my words, and shakes his head at me.

''Of course you would've.. You're the stubborn one in the family'' I smile, and roll my eyes at his words. ''You know i'm right'' He laughs, and pokes my side until i let out a laugh myself.

It doesn't take long before he's fast asleep. Everything uses his energy these days, and i guess my little break down didn't exactly make it any better. I let out a deep sigh, and walk over to the window.

I take a seat on the chair, and look out on all the people coming in and out of the hospital. And then a certain blonde haired guy catches my eyes once again. My lips tug into a small smile, as i watch him leave the hospital.

Harry.. Harry, that's his name..