Slow And Steady (Alastor x Fem!Reader)

Panic

 Loud

You could hear everything

Just minutes ago, you were talking to Angel, comparing poisons, drama, drinks, drugs, dresses, and boys. Now, you were having a panic attack. You could hear everything. You could see everything. Why did Angel Dust have to falter? To pause? Why did you have to turn, to see a missing Alastor who knew this would happen. He knew you had separation anxiety. He knew this would happen. Where did he go? Why didn't he tell you? Are you being too clingy?

Thoughts hammered against your skull, a headache surfacing in response. Your chest hurt. Your fingers and toes were numb. Did you have fingers or toes? You couldn't feel them. You lean against the wall, a headache at full force, everything loud, getting louder, and vision going black around the edges. You realize you're sitting against the wall, chewing your finger. But you couldn't remember doing it.

Your finger should hurt.

It doesn't.

The sharp pang in your chest brings you to reality, and you realize you've begun to hyperventilate. Maybe you'll pass out. Your vision got darker, bleaker...So close to passing out. Breathe faster. Faster, faster, faster...Your finger was bleeding, you tasted the sharp metallic pang of blood.

You keep chewing.

Faster, faster, faster...

Radio static filled the air. It was familiar. You pushed the thought aside.

Breathe faster, faster...faster...

"Oh, dear, I don't believe you should be doing that."

What? That was a familiar voice. That was Alastor's voice. You opened your eyes, though you don't remember shutting them. You don't remember much, do you? It was indeed Alastor. The one and only. You were still hyperventilating, still holding your mangled, bloody finger in your mouth, your arm attached to it dangling limply, and you were still getting dizzy from the spinning room, but you smiled for him. Alastor had sat down next to you, his forever lasting smile seeming to impossibly turn down at the corners. He took your arm, guiding it away from your mouth. A dime of blood falls on your shirt. He runs a clawed finger along the deep teeth mark, and you fail to hide a wince. Hearing it, he pulls his finger away and calls out for someone. You think. You lost hearing a few minutes ago. You saw him call out, but you couldn't hear it. All you wanted to do was close your eyes. Rest. Pass out. Let yourself calm down from your attack. You closed your eyes and rested against Alastor.

The world fades into black

                                                                     ❤️❤️❤️

Darkness.

It's what you wake up to, it's the last thing you remember. Some hours have passed since you lost consciousness. You're comfy. You realize your laying on someone's bed. You can't bring yourself to care. Racking your brains, you try to remember what else you did. Besides darkness, you remember leaning on the all-powerful, very feared Radio Demon. You got some blood on his suit. You made a mental note to apologize for that later. But it went black after that. That's it. Cutting to black as it does on the Broadway musicals. Wow, how dramatic. Sitting up, your stomach heaves. You grow dizzy, taking a few short breaths. Your head is pounding, like a terrible hangover. You fall back into the mountain of pillows on the bed, and no sooner had you lay before the door opened, revealing a 'frowning' Alastor. You turn and flash him a sweet smile. Worry is evident in his eyes, his 'frown' staying. You wanted to reassure him that you're fine, so you move to get up. But. You hear the worst, most terrible, horrible noise. Cringing back and covering your ears, your eyes searching for the culprit. You're shaking like a leaf, the pressure headache coming back. Two sharp, gloved hands find your shoulders, and pushes you back, keeping you pinned to the bed, and the noise fades. Through the haze, you come to realize it was Alastor. His sharp hands brush through your hair, an apology, and a small kiss was left on your crown. You could live with this. If you take it slow and steady, for both of your sakes.