Chasm - (ON HOLD until further notice)

Chapter 28: Stranded

I looked over at my phone, thinking it had vibrated but it didn't. Katarina hadn't texted me back yet. She seemed so distracted the last time I messaged her and then Frankie told me he had seen her at a bar with her friend and some guy, acting all cuddly and really dialing on the PDA. She didn't like PDA. It was one of her rules. But Frankie was pretty sure it was Katarina that he saw, holding some guys hand while at Corky's.

I didn't know how to feel when I heard that. I small pang of jealousy hit my chest as he recalled her sitting on some guys lap, making out with this guy, and dancing with him. I feigned disinterest in the conversation, trying not to show him I was bothered and also to get him to shut up. I didn't want to hear about it. I wanted to message her right away but felt too awkward. She was clearly spending time with someone else and as time went by without hearing a word from her, I just sunk. I hadn't payed attention to anyone but her since we started our friends with benefits deal. I didn't expect her to do the same but I also didn't expect to hear about her hanging around some guy. If it had been just the one time then I would have just let it go but one of Nikki's posts told me that it wasn't just the one time. She posted a picture of her and Katarina at a party. There was a guy there, his hand on Katarina's waist and she was leaning into him. She looked comfortable being close to him, in front of other people. Katarina was like me; she didn't date. It looked like she found someone who changed her mind for a moment.

Her random text to me sent a wave of also random relief through my body. I was relieved to hear from her and for a moment it seemed like maybe she wasn't dating. Why would she have texted me if she was dating someone. She wouldn't, I thought. I tried to shake the unfamiliar feeling of jealousy and anxiety that was surging through me as I impatiently waited for her to reply to my text. It was frustrating that I felt this way about her.

It was so foreign to me, the way I was acting and the way I thought about her constantly. She was an endless loop inside my mind as I pictured her with me in so many ways. I craved her, I wanted her, I missed her. I missed her... That was another strange feeling. I missed her. I never missed anyone. Not any girl I had been with had I ever missed being around but I missed her. I missed her body, her lips, the way she kissed me. I missed her laugh and her smile and the way she blushed when she saw me staring at her. I missed the way she would brush her fingers through my hair and the way she would huff whenever I smacked her ass. I really missed her.

The last time we were together left a a gnawing feeling inside my chest. She was unbelievable. I couldn't get it out of our mind. She was so incredibly sexy. I had no idea that she had such a dark side to her. I didn't know she liked it that rough. Every part of my body tingled when I thought about that night. The way her back arched, the way she groaned when my hands slapped her ass. She liked it, she really fucking liked it and it made me feel like a kid in a candy store. I was excited. I was so excited about her that I couldn't even deny it.

I started pacing around my living room, my hand running through my hair in frustration. I didn't know when I suddenly developed such intense feelings for Katarina. I didn't know how I could have but I did. I'd never liked any girl I slept with. I was attracted to them and I enjoyed their company but I never actually liked any of them. I liked Katarina. I actually liked her. The thought of her would make me smile. When I heard her voice, my body would feel like it was melting. I couldn't stop thinking about her. When I thought of her with someone else it would infuriate me. It would make me so angry that my fists would clench as I pictured her wrapped around someone else. I fucking liked this girl.

My phone vibrated on my table, the screen flashing at me as her name was printed on it. I picked up the phone, fighting with myself on whether or not I should answer the call. I pressed the phone to my ear, swallowing my nervousness. "Hello?"