Sins of our Father

I saw him yesterday in my sleep. We were walking on the streets of Moscow. I really wanted to show him ever part of my city, my home, the school where I have graduated from, cafes where I was going for drinking nearly every weekend while hanging with my friends and of course Red Square, the place where all people around the world are coming to Moscow for visiting. While I was thinking about these places, he was asking me lots of questions like how far was the place where we were going, at which o'clock was the palace closed for entering, where should we eat our dinner that day... Most of them were silly questions, but I liked his questions and the way he was. His curios and talkative character that always asked questions.

As we continued our walking, suddenly we saw someone just in front of us. He was holding a pistol in his right hand. I couldn't believe that he met us in this god damn big city. The person in front of me was my ex-boyfriend. I thought I wouldn't see his terrible face again in my life, but the life is like Kinder Surprise. You cannot know what surprises you will face. He started to talk in nonsense. 'How could you hang with this god damn boy? Do you believe that he gives more care about you than I do? He will leave you and you will never know when he left you.'

My ex-boyfriend was totally wrong. First of all, he left me by leaving a simple message from his telephone. I tried to call him but he had to change his number because it was not available any more. I gave some time to think about what could have I done wrong to him. He has never turned back to me or explained his reason about the problem between us. I couldn't believe that he just leave me after spending three years together. But now, he was saying that like everything was my fault about our relationship. He pointed his pistol at me, thinking that he would never shot me. He didn't have that courage and I knew that he just still loves me, but it didn't happen as I thought. My ex-boyfriend shot him, from his heart. There was a loud cry. It was the last thing that I heard, because my dream had ended.

After I wake up, I think about this dream for a long time. How many years have passed since we didn't see each other? I don't want to count the days. I know that he still wants to see me, but why didn't he answer my messages for months? Every day I look to my mails to see if he texted to me back or not, but still there is no answer. Am I getting stupid to think that we will see each other again? No, I have faith on him. He has got some serious problems; otherwise he would have definitely texted me back.

I look at the clock and see that I am getting late for my job. I get dressed and go to the kitchen. There is still some time to drink tea at least. I pour hot water in a cup and then put tea in it. I really like its smell. It makes me feel better, but I don't know the reason behind it. While I am drinking my tea, I eat some fruits for breakfast. I have to leave my home now. I don't want my boss to get mad at me. I like my job, working in a company as sales manager's assistant. It is a big company that sells different type of medicines for every big hospital around Russia. Many of our customers are happy to cooperate with us. That's why, I am earning good amount of money and I hope I will earn more.

I use metro in order to go work as I always do. When I get there, I enter into the building and use the elevator to go up to the sixth floor. When the elevator reaches the sixth floor, I walk into my office and see my manager, sitting on my table. I really wonder why he is in my office. 'Good morning boss, I didn't expect to see you in here. Is there any problem?'

'Of course there isn't any problem. I am just passing from here and I want to look at your office. I like the pictures you have on your table.'

He is holding a very old photo of mine. Actually the photo was sent me after I turned back to Moscow from Germany. We were holding each other's hand and getting enjoyed on our last day that we have been together.

'You are looking very happy in here with your boyfriend I see. Who is he?'

I took the photo from his hand and leave it on my table again. 'It doesn't matter. Just an old friend.' I looked into my boss face. He has combed his blond hair before he left his house I suppose. He has got blue eyes, small nose and a deep scar on his forehead. I always wonder about how that scar had happened. Did he fall and crush his head strictly or did he get into a fight? Actually if you don't think about that scar, he looks more handsome than so many other Russian guys.