ꜱᴇᴄʀᴇᴛꜱ ᴏꜰ ʜᴇᴀʀᴛꜱ ᴀɴᴅ ꜱᴏᴜʟꜱ

Mysteries of a Broken Soul

Ciel and his butler just left Lau's opium cave in the middle of the night, after they quickly advised the others about the plan, and assigned them their tasks. They had to stay low, and don't draw any attention, knowing Undertaker, the "new" Earl, and Scotland Yard are all after them.

It was pitch dark and freezing cold. Not just outside of the carriage but in Ciel's mind as well. He was staring into the black void with a lifeless gaze, sucked far too deeply in his thoughts to notice anything else.

In the first few minutes of the ride Sebastian tried to catch Ciel's eyes and discuss the details of their plan and disguise, but seeing the young master's empty look, he gave up and let his own thoughts surface on the opposite side of the carriage.

Ciel tried his absolute hardest to keep his mask on of being though and fearless in front of everyone, but he was so incredibly tired of doing it that he just stopped, for now, hoping Sebastian wouldn't say anything. The truth is, he was broken. Completely broken on the inside and the only one who probably sensed it was his butler. He still couldn't process the whole situation with his dead brother coming back to life, and taking away everything he worked for, but he didn't want to think about that at all. At least now.

His thoughts went back to his early childhood when everything was fine, not perfect but at least fine. Followed by every vivid detail of that night which made his heart beat faster. Then came a sudden relief as he got to the part of Sebastian appearing and saving him from that hell. They have been together for a long time, almost 5 years, and the demon still selflessly followed every order. To top that, he even seemed to actually care about the boy and their missions sometimes. Recently Ciel thought about this matter a lot but still didn't manage to understand why. Why would an incredibly powerful demon-like Sebastian serve and stay with someone like him for this long? There is no way his soul is that special. He's just an ordinary boy, after all.

Ciel hid something else, which had him questioning himself over and over again. He clearly knows it's stupid and definitely not possible, but still better to think about this than the alternative. It started about a while ago when they were on the Campania and Undertaker almost killed Sebastian with his death scythe. That moment he started feeling something he didn't feel in a long time, and that was the fear of losing someone. Someone who mattered. First, he was telling himself it was just because he needed the demon's protection, but slowly he had to realize it was much more than that. Sebastian gave him back the feelings of trust, hope, being safe and cared about, which he thought he'd never experience again. Theses gave meaning to Ciel's life, reasons to live and start hoping again, even if just a tiny bit...

The screeching stop of the carriage brought Ciel's mind back to the present, but he was so exhausted, his body still didn't want to move.

-We arrived at the hotel, my lord. If you do not wish to change the plan, I will go in first and book a room as we agreed beforehand.

-...

-Young Master?

-Yes, do as you said, but do it quickly because I'm freezing here.

-Understood.

A few minutes passed, which felt hours to the shivering boy, then finally he heard a knock on the carriage's door. The next moment his butler helped him off the vehicle.

They stepped inside the huge building, and Sebastian took him to their room, which was on the third floor.

It was almost dawn when Ciel could finally go to sleep in the huge bed which was still a bit smaller and rougher than his one at the manor. He was so drained, he fell asleep almost immediately.