Bertolt x reader (the beautiful pain)

The coming night

Whos that sexy
Thang I see over here
Thats me
Standing in the mirror

Mirror oh mirror
I couldn't believe the fact the girl in the mirror wore this uniform with pride, Haha joke on me, i used to hate this oufit, its too "lame" "outdated" "ugly" compared to the custom made  dresses at my mansion.
I felt kinda proud wearing them, yet felt lil bit sad, i traced my material, it was far cheap compared to mine at home, but it's contained a huge honorable wear them.  I saw everyone prepare themselves, Maya being her clumsy self, looking for her belt, Krista helped her, meanwhile others just having themselves I smiled, im gonna miss them.
Past is past, and I will keep moving on.

The night
All the comrades were standing still and strong in the straight queue , new faces of the trained soldiers new humanity hopes,
The ministry of military entered the hall, and all eyes including me on them, immediately I felt weight on my shoulder.
This is the happening
New life, new chapter and new me

"HANDS UPON YOUR HEART" the leadership scream
"YES SIR"

The unusual goosebumps all over my body, the voices of humanity , the voices of the soldiers who once a child , the voices of new hope from the young
Excitement And determination
This is where all has started
"I think I don't have to introduce myself anymore, since this face has many times trained all of you during past years"
"However, a big congratulations to all of you, for making a big decision to stay, not many could stand this hellish place, but the people in front of me, manage to stand here, I am so honored having all of you in this department "
"For you trainees graduating today, three paths are provided to you choose, choose them wisely, only one path is allowed to every comrades"
"All branches are all the same, we aim to save humanity from getting brink, annihilating all those pig faces, "
"Listen! Whatever the path is, put everything into humanity"
"I will begin, remember, chose them WISELY"
"The first path is Liberty , liberty is asking for free, a break from the being chained, They go outside wall, what a glory moments they captured, from a beautiful view to the unbearable death they definitely are our hero.
Second is Garrison for those who wanted to see the top of world, to witness the other sides of our world,  standing between of our two world, and they will provide the wall the best safety. Brigade for those who are in Top Ten, they are privileged to give honorable service to The Royal, "
.......

"After so many years of traning, i have seen a lot of improvement from you, but there are ten of you are outstanding, whether from academics and physical training "

"BERTOLT HOOVER!" The chief mentioned him name,
I am not suprised, hes incredibly good tho

I glanced at him, who walking  in front me, our eyes met,  I smiled at him who is joining Mikasa, Reiner as the top ten. I felt kinda proud.
It must feel good standing there.
"Don't worry y/n, eventhought we arent in the list, we will have the chance to join Garrison"
Maya nudged me, I smiled at her as well.
"Yeah, at least we are still at the wall"
Thats the last chat of us at the night.

.....
They held party to celebrate the graduation. After 2 shots, I decided to walk to the dorm, to get some fresh air, leaving maya and others, having fun, tbh I hate crowd, they reminded me of the party held by father
Unfortunately gate to dorm were lock, I dont think the lock will open soon, so I decided to just walk around instead.