Estranged || A Female Toni Stark Story

Louder Than Words

"Take off the suit and what are you?"

The first hit comes down hard, knocking the wind clear from Toni's lungs. It's hard to breathe.

"I know people with none of that worth ten of you."

Steve's fists collide with the mask leaving a dent in the metal and a series of cuts along her cheek.

"The only thing you really fight for is yourself."

Blood starts dripping down Toni's face obstructing her vision.

"You're not the one to make the sacrifice play."

The mask gets ripped off, but all she can see is the red liquid that's glossing over her pupils. It's turning the world around her a deep crimson.

"You better stop pretending to be a hero."

She tries to take a breath but only ends up choking on her own blood, a sour, metallic taste now resting upon her tongue.

"Always a way out."

The shield comes down directly into the centre of Toni's chest plate, hard.

The outer ring of vibranium smashes into the arc reactor as if it were nothing, leaving the pale blue light that was illuminating the room, flickering like mad. Once, twice, then it dies altogether. The path meant to lead one through the darkness was gone. The light that held the power of Toni's heart was dead. Her life had passed. Her heart was destroyed.

At that moment, Toni realized that it was finished. That there was nothing else to do, that everything was over. And it felt like her whole world just fell apart. For once in her life, there was no way out, there was no other option but to let the situation simply become of itself. The fight was over.

Deep down, somewhere far, far away, buried under years of pain, was a voice telling her to continue, to try. It was hope. The hope that there had to be some spark left in the blaze of fire that had gone out. But at this particular moment in time, after all that had happened, it seemed that Toni was too far gone. Hope didn't exist. The very foundation of the words meaning had disappeared.

She shut down.

Toni's body was giving her consent to give up. Some piece of her broken soul was gifting herself the right of letting go, something she was never known to do. Ever.

But even so, despite her values, Toni let it happen. There was nothing worth fighting for anymore. It was the end of the line.

Her mind was telling her to accept the fact that this was the end. That perhaps this was the way she deserved to go, like nothing. As a coward, a failure, a disgrace, a monster. She had torn her family apart, and this was her punishment.

So she laid on the cold cement floor unmoving beneath Steve. She gave no notice to her suit, which was damaged beyond repair. She let her mind drain of will, she allowed her body to be stripped of fight, and she deprived her soul of fuel. All Toni could muster to do was look up at the man she had come to love and care for more than anyone else in the world, as he stared back down at her with a certain coolness that just about froze her over.

"You were wrong Toni."

'I know, I know. I'm sorry. I'm sorry I did this. I'm sorry I didn't listen. You were right,' Toni tries to speak, but her throat is closed up. 'Please, I'm sorry,' she tries again. No words come out.

"You've run your course, Toni. And it's over." Steve says as he grabs hold of the shield and pulls it from Toni's suit only to drop it beside her seconds later.

'No. No, please. Please... Steve, ' she ends up mouthing to herself. The Captain's back is turned.

'Don't leave me here. Don't leave me alone.'

He walks towards his friend, -A murderer, an assassin, a killer,- and helps him to his feet.

'But he killed my parents. Steve, he killed them. He killed them.'

No one hears her cry, not even Toni herself, because now her ears are ringing. A constant high pitch, electric like sound is filling her head. She tries to cover the base of her ears, but she can't move her arms, they're pinched to her sides being held down but the dead suit.

Dread suddenly hits Toni right in the chest; A dead suit, that means she can't move at all. That means she's trapped inside the closed off walls of the metal armour. She can't get out. She was going to die like this.

Steve wrapped an arm around the soldier to support him and led him under the archway and out of the bunker. He didn't even bother giving her a second glance. He didn't look back.

Toni let out a small whimper as his figure disappeared. She kept her gaze fixed upon the very corner he rounded when he went out of sight. She waited for a few minutes. One turned into two. Two to three, and three to four. Soon enough a half-hour passed and he hadn't returned. He never would.

Letting out a stranged breath, Toni shivered. Her limbs were limp and seemingly frozen in place. She couldn't move. She could barely feel.

Her breaths came out in clouds of smoke around her face momentarly obstructing her vision. The dried blood that coated her body was solidified as was the pools that stained the floor beneath her.

Air seeped through the cracks in her suit, causing her to twitch ever so slightly, and as the wind picked up and the gusts became stronger, blinding beads of pain were sent up Toni's body. It felt like she was laying upon a bed of nails.

Finally, as her eyelids grew heavier with each wasted second passing by, only providing her with more time to think over her misery and destruction of a life, she closed her eyes hoping darkness would soon set in. She was ready for the end to come.