Nothing but an Image

the story

“Otherwise have you been doing fine?” the doctor peers into my sharp green eyes, awaiting a response.

“Yep, I’m fine. No need to worry doc.” I utter impulsively, without any actual thought to if I need anything else. I just want to get out of here.

“Okay, great! See you next week Kyle.”  The doctor tells me as I sit up from the black, leather seat beneath me. Without greeting him goodbye, I stroll out the room, grasping the cold, steel handle and pushing the door open, leading me to the waiting room.  Everything about this building is so bland, so lifeless. The walls are painted a solid grey, with one tiny window placed near the front desk. Surrounding the empty walls are beige, clearly cheap, chairs that could easily crumple under the weight of someone larger. I look to my left and see Leda, carefully placed in one of the seats. Her tiny figure couldn’t even make the seat crack; she is so delicate, so small, and so precious. Her presence being the only life brought to the building, hell, even this whole town.

I lock eyes with her as we stare at each other for a couple of seconds, every other thought escapes my mind.  Her stunning Celeste eyes seem to keep me in a trans with the only image to mind being Leda. How her long wavy brown hair falls down from her head, off her shoulders and ending on her chest.  How the freckles placed on her face seem to be lightly brushed on and if you even so place your hand on her cheek they will vanish.  Everything about her seems to be so perfect and delicate. God I love her, but she doesn’t love me back. To her I am nothing but a best friend, viewed as a brother. I’ve known her most of my life and her feelings towards me have never changed, nor do I think they will.

I watch her as she stands up from the seat and walks towards me, keeping our eyes locked on each other.

“Hey can we go now? This place is honestly really lame.” She more so demands then questions, obviously irritated.

“Uh, yeah sure.” I reply blankly. In the corner of my eye, I view the woman slouched at the front desk, giving me the most judgemental and questioning look.  Every week I come here with Leda and every time I am given the most offhand looks. She should really mind her own business and not listen in to our conversations. I guess maybe I am doing something wrong or saying something offensive, but either way she shouldn’t be eavesdropping.

I feel a tug at my wrist and realize it is Leda, attempting to drag me towards her and out the door so we can leave. I choose to not protest on the matter and slip out the door behind her, peering into the seemingly empty parking lot. We both trudge over to the single, grey vehicle placed almost perfectly between 2 chipped and faded yellow lines.

The car ride home is filled with empty voices of the songs blaring out of the speakers into our ears. I hear the lyrics, but all the meaning seems to vanish and be replaced by the thoughts of what the doctor told me.  Every time I go there it’s as if I go to receive more bad news to be wedged in the corner of my mind, only to haunt me at the worst of times. I pull into my driveway and stumble through the door, Leda following close behind.

“How was the appointment Kyle?” My mother asks in a sweet and caring tone, but I choose to ignore, being I am not in the mood. Approaching my door, I lightly push it open and hop onto my bed. I stare at the sealing, as if I was having a contest with an inanimate object on who could last the longest without shutting their eyes. Realizing I will come to a loss, I turn my head over to Leda, whom is sitting on the ground, legs pulled to chest, gazing at the window across the room.

“We should go driving tomorrow” she mumbles out the words, making me just be able to comprehend her request.

“Why? And where?”  I question, but already knowing the answers.