Unrequited Love || ✓

lavender love

One-sided love is love when it's untold, once it's said becomes a mess.

2012.

Every morning, as the door was opened, the laying of flowers was spread seemed to wish me good morning, I bowed down and kept blushing as if someone has expressed their love to me. For the last seventeen years, these vouchers of lavenders never separated from me.

Outside the physics class, the beauty and smell of lavenders were never known whose smell was kissing in someone's life.

Our class was from 7 a.m. and before the staircase, we were welcomed by those beautiful flowers whose smell and love spread overnight.

The first meeting with him happened to be here in the coaching classes itself.

He was the most intelligent boy in the whole class. His personality looked much more attractive. Many girls used to talk with him for one or the other reasons or false matters itself but on the pretext of notes and all, I used to feel a bit absurd, so I could never talk to him.

I never spoke to him once in a year class but his mesmerizing face was always visible in my eyes.

On that day when he entered the class, I felt like looking into his eyes and just staring at him but I never dared to do that, that day I had freed my hair from the rubber band that dangled from my waist.

It was true in love a person becomes more adorable and beautiful if not external but from within.

Like every day, I was opening the lock of my cycle and was taking it out from the path when Neil called my name a little loudly, "Avni..."

For a moment, I felt as if my breath has stopped, then acting confident I immediately turned towards him.

Before I could speak anything, he asked, "aaj riya kyun nhi aai?"

I answered nonchalantly,
"mujhe nhi pata."

He was left but I was lost in myself. There was no more romantic moment in my life than having my name on Neil's lips which sounds so blissful and soothing in my ears.

I was lost in his thoughts the whole night, chanting my name again and again blushingly.

The next day, I reached fifteen minutes before the time of the class. Standing on the vouchers of lavender flowers I started waiting for him.

It was too late, classes had already started but he didn't appear.

After feeling disappointed, I sat down in the class. I kept waiting for him next several days and then weeks but he didn't come.

One day I heard boys talking about his transfer to Delhi for best coaching. I was sad but then I was happy too that he was happy and fine.

After the completion of the course and session, everyone went back to their homes and I also returned with memories of Neil. I was not passed my medical exams but was sure that his name will be top of the merit list.

I had understood with time we don't have any connections between us. And what was it then, after that there was no hope of meeting Neil.

The pain of loving someone who will never be mine was something unskeptical and I had decided to live with it.

I left his path because walking on his path too, I can never reach his heart.

Loving someone who doesn't know about your love in return, actually feels like trying to fly with broken wings.

I changed my way and took maths as a subject, I was chosen as a lecturer at the Top Notch University.

After that, when relations started coming for marriage, no boy was liked by my heart or even mind, and how it should be liked when my heart-mind everything has conquered his name on it.