Envy // Five x oc

But I Want To Help

I go to my room and ask for something to help me. Why can't I use my power without getting worn out? The others can. It's not fair! I sit in my room drawing. Like I usually do. Today I don't think I'm gonna get rest since I got all that rest earlier. I go back to my bed and lay there. Somehow I quickly fall fast asleep and dream.

In the morning I get ready in my uniform and for once get somewhere on time without using my powers. I walk down to breakfast. My head is still spinning since yesterday. I need food. Instead of waiting for the others, I go sit down immediately. I hope no one will be mad at me for doing that.

After a few small minutes my siblings walk through to the table.

"Hey," I smile weakly. Why can't I be normal and not collapse

They say an abundance of hey's. All except for Five. He just sits next to me, concern etched across his face. He doesn't say a word. Now I'm upset more than anything. Does he not care about me? I know none of them asked about me but Five is the only one I want to care.

"Hey, how are you feeling?" Allison sits opposite me.

"Just a bit dizzy still. I don't know why that happened yesterday." I shrug, not wanting to talk about it.

"What were you doing," Five finally speaks up, "when you collapsed I mean." I sigh. He doesn't ask me if I'm okay. No. He asks what I was doing. What has that got to do with anything??? It's not like I just fell asleep. I collapsed in the middle of the house! 

"I was skipping time until tea. Why?" I ask, rolling my eyes. Does he care?

"That will be why. You need to stop using time manipulation, Lilia." he seems concerned. But he wouldn't be. Its Five for God's sake. He doesn't care about anyone except for himself. 

"Yeah, times, you shouldn't do it if it's hurting you." Klaus contributes. I didn't know he cares about me. None of the boys have ever shown signs that they in the slightest cared for my well being. Five sometimes shows that he is interested in how I am but then again this is Five we are talking about. Why would he care for someone as stupid as me? 

My siblings sometimes call me times, as Klaus just did. We have nicknames for each other. Most of them are barely used though. The ones we use more often are mine, Ben's and Allison's. Luther has always wanted to go to the moon so we call him spaceboy. Diego is the kraken. Due to her powers, Allison is called the rumour. It's the same reason that we call Klaus the seance. They both dislike the nicknames. Five is the only one without a nickname. I guess he likes his so-called name staying as Five. Ben is the horror as I've already said. We all call Vanya the bore, behind her back. Sometimes I feel bad but then I remember how she likes Five. 

I glare at Klaus with annoyance, "I can use my powers when I want. You all do so why can't I? Anyway since when have you cared? You have never shown any cares for me." I snatch my plate from the table and storm upstairs. How dare they try to act like they care. They have never cared for me.

I sit at my desk, nibbling my breakfast as I draw. I draw what I feel. I draw a little girl. Shadows loom over her. They stand tall behind her. Not protecting but instead watching. Waiting. White eyes peer down on her. They send threats through their glares. The girls eyes are pleading. They seem so alone but they don't look lonely. It's a though it's nicer to be alone. 

I wake up to someone continually poking me. My head is in my arms. Underneath are tons of my artworks. I must've fallen asleep while I was drawing. I guess I do need the rest. I can't form any words apart from two.

"Piss off." i manage to groan. The person doesn't say anything. They keep poking me. Could they stop! Who even is it? I lift my head slightly to side and groan. It's Five, "What do you want, prat?" 

"Jeese, I was just checking you weren't dead!" Five's eyes are red. Puffy too. What is wrong today?

"Have you been-"

"No!" 

Fire blazes in his eyes. It was quick but I saw it. Just a glimpse into his emotions but I saw it. Everyone says that he's heartless but he does have emotions. Sometimes, they can be as dormant as a fly in a spider web. Other times they are the playful puppy I dream of at night. They are alive and free to run. Five rarely shows his emotions. He's always been like that. For as long as I have known him. 

"Gonna tell me why?"

"Why what?"

"Why you came up here." 

"Dad wants us to go on a mission." I get up but Five pushes me back down again. He shakes his head, "you have to stay here. It's just gonna be us lot." Five looks at me, a certain sorrow seeps into his eyes. Why is that so upsetting? I would just get in the way. The others are better off without me. I'm useless at everything I do. I can't even manipulate time without failing miserably. 

"Go then." I say coldly. I didn't mean to be so rude and blunt. I'm hurting. I'm hurting a lot.