This Boy's Journey

Chapter Nine: About Last Night...

I came home after dinner, still thinking about my dinner with Paul. I can't deny that I find Paul attractive. Most people would look to Ryan as the heartthrob in the group, but I find obvious beauty uninteresting. Paul's personality is what I'm drawn to the most. He's funny and quite intelligent. He's also a coworker at my new job and the last thing that I want to do is ruin this opportunity.

I sit at the kitchen island table, playing on my phone as my mind wanders around and I hear Michael opening the door, fresh from his day with Zane.

"Honey, I'm home!" he yells from the doorway.

"I'm in here!" I say back.

Michael comes into the kitchen and stars in the oval doorway with a bright smile. "How was your day?" he asks with a sigh, clearly pleased with his.

"It was good, I think." I turn off my phone and clasp my hands together. "We defined some of the side characters and I think it'll help drive home the theme and the character development of Travis and I'm sure Anthony will be telling Zane about it." I left out the part that a lot of the ideas came from me. I don't need the glory for myself as long as the show is strong.

"That sounds amazing!" he says and hugs my side, forcing a smile across my face.

"How was your day?" I ask.

"Boring and productive." Michael let me go and walked around to the other side of the island. "The meetings were one-sided and we're getting basically everything we want like we expected. The budget, thirteen episodes, hour-long, crew and directions are all lined up. I don't expect it to be like this every time, but I'm not complaining."

"So, it sounds like all that's left is really the script. No pressure."

"I'm sure it'll be the best thing ever written."

"The best since Game of Thrones."

Michael grabs his forehead and says, "Ugh, don't remind me. That last season killed me."

"I'll never forgive how they did to Daenerys."

Michael pulls out his phone and asks, "Are you hungry? I think I'm feeling like Chinese."

"Oh...I already ate.'

"Nice, you went out with the guys?"

"Actually, it was just with Paul."

"Oh." Michael put down his phone and looked at me. "Paul?"

"Yeah."

There's a pause between us as he purses his lips, like he doesn't want to say what he needs to. "I noticed him checking you out at the party. It's subtle, but I pay attention to those things."

"I didn't notice," I say, genuinely surprised.

"Not that I blame him," as Michael says this, our eyes lock. "So, we should probably talk about last night."

"I think you're right. I this a kitchen conversation?"

"Actually, this feels like a porch conversation."

Michael takes a beer and I pour myself a cup of water and we walk outside to the porch. It's small, but there's a nice view of the setting sun, casting the city in a soft gold. I can hear the sound of the sea mixed with the light sounds of traffic. It's peaceful in a way, like two things that shouldn't be in accord and yet are. We sit down in black metal chairs around a glass table and smile slightly uncomfortably at each other.

"So," he starts, after slapping his knee. "Yesterday was foggy, but not so much that I don't remember what happened. There's no denying that there's a connection between us, but, and I think we both know, that there are many reasons why we shouldn't pursue this."

"I would have to agree with you on that," I say, and then sip down my water as if that makes the truth easier to swallow.

"To be brutally honest, I don't think that I truly appreciated you the way I should have and ever since I reached out to you I've been imagining how things could've gone if we spent all this time together."

"That's actually nice to hear." His honesty is refreshing and I didn't expect him to confess this. It's very rare that you receive the words that you're most hoping to hear. "I kind of always saw you as the one who got away."

"I had no idea."

"I thought you were the master of subtleties." I raise an eyebrow as I give him back his own words.

"I have a sort of blindspot when it comes to We are starting this new venture and we're living together, with that said, I have a proposition."

"That sounds enticing," I chuckle and set my glass down.

"It's nothing so scandalous, and you're more than welcome to decline, but I'd like to see where this goes. Nothing official and we don't have to take it far. I just want to get to know you on a deeper level."

"Yeah, I'm on board," I say. I hate how casual this sounds, especially because I'm a writer, but when I'm overcome with emotions—not unlike how I felt with Paul—I tend to be terse. A part of me wonders if this stems from him feeling threatened. I haven't been in many relationships, and I've never had two guys interested in me at the same time, so this is all new for me. Then my mind runs away from me and I imagine all of this blowing up in my face and ruining this whole production because their feelings got hurt. I'm praying that that can be avoided at all costs. This is the best opportunity of my life and if I screw it up I'll never forgive myself.