Call me by your name, or I'll leave

[2]

She pushes her body close to mine, and while kissing we absorb each other's aura. Touching her is like heaven, and for a moment I lose myself in it. Memories come up and I remember my first time, doing it with her, wanting to do it again. Then it catches me: I push her down from my lap. We sit silently next to each other and nobody says a word. Then, with her French accent and tiny voice she asks me: „Is this what you want Ellio or no?" I can't answer. She turns away and closes her book. I shouldn't have done this. I wonder what Oliver will do if he finds out, and something tells me that he will.

Marzia gets up and puts her book back in her pocket. She looks at me, with a desperate smile, and then turns around to hop on her bike.
We both drive back home, and without saying a word, she leaves me there, in front of my garden. I look back at her, before I enter the courtyard of our house. The sun is still bright, but it has a much darker orange tone. I feel guilty, but also relieved. I shouldn't feel relieved.

Silently, I place my bike next to a wall from our house, and I enter from the back door. While entering I see Oliver from the corner of my eye, as he approaches me and touches my waist. „Where were you?" I say nothing and smile, but then look away. „Look me into the eyes Ellio." He says to me in a deeper tone, which attracts me more to him but also frightens me. Oliver already pulled me closer to him, and I can feel his breath on my skin. „I want you tonight."

With that sentence his eyes light up, and he smiles at me softly. It was true what I said, but it didn't tell the whole truth. Someday I would have to tell him, but it was not now.
He rolls his hand under my shirt and keeps touching me, and I just enjoy the moment and lean my head back. It arouses me when he does this without saying a word, but what he says right then even makes my heart beat go way faster. „Oliver, your skin feels so good." Since he made me call him by my name, it never stopped feeling so good. It was a moment of love and passion.

Oliver goes down with his hand and starts rubbing under my pants, which makes me go hard immediately. The fact that we are all alone and that he could fuck me through every room in this house makes me so happy and enthusiastic that I really want him to do it now. I start touching his hair and he lifts me up, and pushes me against the wall. It hurts, but I can't complain since it's him who hurts me physically sometimes. I feel his dick pressing against me, and while he kisses my neck aggressively I can't but scream „Ellio" out loud, even if he told me not to.

He stops kissing me and holds me, but his eyes are now staring at mine, and he's not smiling anymore. „I told you not to.", are his last words before he takes me to the kitchen table, turns me around and slams my body on the wood. My chin crashes against the table, but Oliver doesn't care. He pulls down my pants and puts it in me. I moan loudly, but he continues. There is no way for me to stop moaning because it feels so good, but as he starts pushing even harder I scream out of pain. „It hurts." I whine, and Oliver stops. „It hurts? Good, because I will fuck you so hard that you will find out what real punishment is." I can hear his anger in his voice, but also the lust. In this moment I start thinking if he's actually mad at me.

Oliver pulls my hair and lifts my head up, which makes me feel so good in a weird way. He pushes his dick in me again, and I can't help but scream. I feel him pressing against my insides, and it makes me want more, even though it's extremely painful. Oliver starts going faster, and I lose it. He makes me feel so good, no matter what he does, or how badly he hurts me, and he knows that. Hearing him moan and feeling his hand on my skin makes me cum. In this second I am ashamed but also surprised I came so fast, and Oliver stops again. „Are you serious?" He hates when I'm first. I feel him pulling out and he aggressively turns me around. I only see his angry face for a second as he pushes me on my knees to suck him. While pressing my head against him, I look up and I see him leaning back and enjoying me doing all the work. He starts moving my head faster and faster, until he cums as well.

We sit on the balcony together, not saying a word. I read my book while eating cereal, and I can see him watching me. „What is it, that you don't want to tell me?" I just don't answer and keep eating. It's really hard to ignore someone you love, especially when u already hurt them in some kind of way. If he ever finds out, then I won't know how to act. I already don't.

He stands up and comes up to me. After taking my book and putting it to the side, he softly touches my leg and looks at me. „Why don't you want to talk? Is it something I did?" I just shake my head and jump off the banister. I take my things inside, not answering. This day, it was just not the right one to talk.