Baby Dearest

The Product of Our Mothers Insensibility

"Yeah, I know," biting the inside of my cheek as knocks roared on the door. Before we could tell them to come in, he walked in with all his glory.

There stood Kane at six foot two and thirty-five years old. I do have to admit, he looked different.

--

"I came as fast as I could," he sighed, his gaze stuck on my mother for a short period of time before they immediately hit me. His eyes raked over me quite slowly as he took in the differences of fourteen year old me to present me. I didn't judge him staring, as I did look completely different now, but there wasn't much to look at.

He quickly diverted his eyes back over to my mother who laid unconscious in her bed. Tubes on tubes worked their magic around her to keep her alive. "How- how is she so far," he asked timidly. Kane wasn't necessarily a timid man but he wasn't assertive either. He wasn't plain, that's far from what I was saying, but nothing much of Kane's mannerisms stood out.

"They don't see her waking up any time soon which is why you're here. They said she lost oxygen for a while until she eventually started breathing on her own again but it wasn't for very long. I told you already but it's presumed they'll need a long time guardian," Maybelle went on.

I leaned against the wall with my arms crossed, my harsh gaze never leaving Kane's body. I didn't look him in the face as I knew my hard exterior would melt. Memories of an amazing man who made sure to be there for my family would flood back and there was no way I could let my guard down right now.

"Yeah, yeah," he said quickly, rubbing his hands against his pant suit jacket. It was a major contrast from the man I remembered, always wearing his blue jeans and plain stripped t shirts. This was not the all American step dad I remembered. "I remember these kids, my pride and joy," he smiled fondly. I turned away as he tried meeting my eyes, wishing I had long hair to cover my face away from his gaze.

My brother gave Kane a hug, Kane patting his shoulder and greeting him, keeping his stare strained on me. "Come on Nicole Clover," he exclaimed. I swiftly turned my head in his direction, looking rather at his lower face than his eyes. "Don't be a stranger, do you guys want to leave now or stay with your mother for some time," he asked us. I went over to the door with my hand on the handle before I spoke. "You look like one and we'd be happy to leave immediately," I said coldly.

"No last goodbye," Maybelle asked.

"She can't hear me," I said, obviously.

Maybelle put a hand on my shoulder and went to sit beside my mothers bed. "She'll be safe with me," she smiled, trying to lighten the mood. "Let me talk with Kane for just a second," she suggested. "Yeah, you guys remember my truck," Kane said, dangling his keys from his pocket. I grabbed Joshua's shoulders, pushing him out of the door in front of me and headed to the exit.

"So," my brother dragged on. "Kane is back," he suggested. I looked across at him, my baby brother now reaching my height as we walked outside into the muggy night air. "If you're looking for my approval to miss him baby bro," I said coldly, not realizing that I didn't need walls with him. Sighing, I cooled my tone. "I don't mind, I think we all missed him a little bit too," I suggested, wanting to grind my teeth at what I just said.

I didn't necessarily miss him, if I knew how I felt about him then I could determine it, but that wouldn't happen until I looked at him. Just the fact that I couldn't look at him let me know that it wasn't how Joshua felt, but that didn't mean it was anymore than that.

I heard fast footsteps come from behind us, only to turn around to see Kane jogging toward us. He stopped in front of us as we stood in front of his 1976 blue and white Chevy. "Alright bud and budette," he said, hopping in his drivers side after unlocking the car.

"Can I sit in the bed," Joshua asked eagerly. "No you may not," Kane quickly retaliated. Joshua groaned and quickly pointed for me to sit in the middle since I was smaller than him.

As we all got settled and Kane drove off agonizingly slow, I made small talk.

"So why can't I be a bud," I asked him abruptly. He hummed in response, his eyes flashing over to me. "Go on, why not bud, Bud," I reiterated. He shrugged and turned down streets I didn't recognize. "I can call you whatever you like Nicole Clover," he smirked. Turning towards me while we sat at a red light. He had taken off his jacket before starting to drive and Kane was now rolling up his sleeves.

"So how is sixteen treating you, young lady," he asked me. I scoffed and kept my eyes on the road in front of us. "That's worse than asking about the weather," I told him. He laughed at me, a big grin coming across his face. "What am I supposed to do prick? You won't talk to me now, let alone look at him, and I know it has nothing to do with what happened to your mother," Kane observed.

I watched his forearms as he drove. Both hands on the wheel, gripping the steering wheel harder than I've ever seen someone grip a wheel before. His facial features sat with ease as stared the road ahead of him.

"She won't talk to anyone nicely if we're being honest," Joshua said loud and proud. "Shut up, rat," I sighed harshly, taking my gaze off of Kane and back to where they belonged, anywhere but him.

"And who is to say I'm not in a bad mood from it," I debated with him. He sighed and didn't answer my question, probably annoyed with my argumentative nature. I looked back out of the window and crossed my arms. I didn't realize it but we were already close to his house. Kane didn't live too far from us and we lived in a small town so it was weird that we never saw him after him and my mother broke up.

"So where exactly do you live," Joshua asked. Kane smirked as he watched the road and shrugged. It sent chills down my spine before I closed my eyes and leaned my head back, arms crossed. "Just past the school, we aren't too far," he said quietly. Joshua scooted over closer to me, resting his head on my shoulder. I opened my eyes to look down at my baby brother who had an indescribable look on his face. It wasn't something I could read, or maybe it was simply the fact that there was no emotion on his face.

Kane hummed to himself beside me, and when I turned my head towards him, his eyes were on mine. With no shame, he kept looking at me as we sat at the red light in front of a neighborhood, probably his. I looked back at my brother before stroking his forehead, not wanting to meet Kanes eyes ever again.