A Better Life (#TheBAPAAwards2020)

A Better Life

Hi....everyone. This is my first ever published work. I suddenly got inspiration to write. Please comment and tell me what you think about it. 

Silence.....that was all that filled the empty one-bedroom apartment. She was used to it by now. She welcomed silence; as if he were an old friend. Picking herself off the floor, she looked around the place she sadly called home.....Clothes scattered, dishes piled in the sink that haven't been washed in ages, old needles on the floor and her pipe chucked in the corner. She could have sworn she saw a rat scamper away into the kitchen.

She stumbled into the bathroom, staring at her reflection in the mirror. White lips and paled face. Her face had sunken in, her cheekbones hollow and prominent. She scrunched her face in disgust and scowled at the girl staring back at her. A girl she barely recognised. A mere shadow of her former self. She often wondered what happened to the innocent and cheerful girl she once was. The girl who was so full of life and who used to radiate happiness. In truth, life happened and with that she lost her innocence. She was too pure for such an impure world. Day after day, her light dimmed, slowly but surely. The worst part of it all was that she allowed it to happen. She allowed the world to take the best of her and snuff out her light.

Angel was her name; the sweet irony of it all. Yet, here she was; succumbed to the darkness like so many before her. Stripped of her wings, a fallen angel. A sour taste took root in her mouth as she swallowed the lump in her throat. There was no room for self-pity now. She knew she couldn't change the past. This was now who she was.

She shivered as she stepped out the bathroom. She could barely afford her rent let alone turning on the heater. She spent the last of her money on her "stuff". That was her escape from reality. Her only way of feeling the happiness and euphoria she craved. She knew without it she wouldn't have made it this long. At times, she needed it so badly that she would frantically scavenge her apartment for loose change.

This is what her life had come to. On some days, she dived into bins to collect newspapers and sell it for whatever it was worth. On other days, she used the only other thing she could....her body. This left her wandering the streets at ungodly hours of the night searching for any stranger who was looking for a good time. All in the name of feeling a false sense of happiness with her pipe but she would take anything she could get.

It didn't take a genius to see she was crumbling...shattering to pieces. You could tell from the dead look in her eyes. Her physical state didn't help either. The body can only take so much until its starts shutting down but that was the cost for her to get through the day. She walked through the dimly lit streets hugging herself, her arms secured tightly around her waist in hopes of keeping warm. Her ripped clothes didn't do much to shelter her from the cold. It was really late when she made her way back "home" after buying her latest stash.

Half an hour later, she was leaning against her bedroom door; needle pierced deep into her skin. There it was again, the feeling of euphoria that she was waiting for but this time it felt a bit different. Her body had finally given out. She could feel it. She knew what was coming. She tried sitting up against the door, her heavy arms propelling her upwards but her actions were futile. She felt drained of all energy. This was it. She swallowed her saliva in hopes of soothing her dry and scratchy throat as she faded in and out of consciousness.

She closed her eyes and till the end she hoped for a better life. What Angel didn't realise was that hope can only get us so far. We have to make ourselves better if we want a better life. A better life doesn't come easy. It has to be worked for. Yes, the world can be a wretched place but it is our choice whether or not to see the best or the worse. It doesn't matter how we are born but what we grow to become. Many of us fail to see how rare and beautiful it is to even exist.

The sun rose for the final time and she faded out. Angel flew away that day, not knowing where her new wings would take her but praying all the pain would be gone.