Survive

Stronger

I just sit there and stare at the wall. I'm just tired. Tired of all this screaming. I just sit there thinking. Thinking and thinking hard about my day.

'you won't make it anywhere'

'you are stupid'

'you have a low IQ'

'you will never do good'

Imagine waking up to it every morning for years. Like literally every morning that's my wake up call. I just roll over and hug Blayke. That's my daughter. Not real one though. She's a teddy bear. But my lifeline. My boyfriend gave it to me. I love him...............Another scream comes again. I get out of bed dreading the day. Just being tossed back and forth. Doing my work to the best of my ability. But I still have to do it over again.

Eventually I finish and run into a corner with my computer and open my messages. I see my boyfriend's messages. First message 'Good morning princess'. Then me tells me how much he loves me. And I smile. Though I don't believe myself to be a princess and I argue with him quite a bit about it, he still stays at it. No budge. I love him nonetheless.

~~~~~~~~~~~

Then the screaming started again. 

Mom is mad at my father. But all the temper always takes it out on me. I close the tab sadly and go outside. I did everything I could as perfectly as possible. And she just screams and screams and screams.

I put on my glasses. Its my secret weapon. When I wear it nobody ever notices when I cry. I go ahead doing everything she says with tears in my eyes.

As the day goes on it doesn't get any better. But I'm used to it. I decided to take a bath about the time dad came home. He starts yelling slurs before he is even in the house. I got out the bathroom and passed between a fight then go in the room and close the door. I walked to my closet and sat flat on the ground trying my best to ignore the screaming.

I just sit and stare at the wall. It's days like this I want to do it. I start to think of my bf and how he sometimes calls me his warrior princess. This made me think even harder. Yes, I do a lot of thinking. I realized I am one, I may not have a crown or jewels or royalty in my blood. But I am one.

A warrior princess saves people from evil forces. That's where their success lies. But sometimes, the biggest evil is their own self. Their own mind. Their own thoughts, when they believe the bad people say to them. My biggest success is saving me from myself for another day. Saving my own life everyday.

I hugged my legs. 

~   ~  ~  ~

And put the razor down.

a/n .......... this story is for the short story competition 'Damsel in Success'. Sometimes the biggest successes are the little ones that let you see another day.