All of the Lights

Chapter Three

Chapter Three

Rob wasn't the most excited about what had happened, but I could tell he was trying his best to stay calm. He didn't want to act too fatherly, but he was my protector. It was hard for him, seeing me go through life phases like this. I knew he wanted to protect my heart, but I was ready to experience things on my own. 

Plus, I wasn't into the drugs or parties that he was talking about anyways. I knew I'd be able to say no to things like that. If that was all he was worried about, he shouldn't be. I wasn't weak-minded and I wasn't a follower. Years in this type of career taught me how to stand up for myself, and I was damn good at it. 

I had told Rob about possibly seeing Sam the following day at his concert. Rob didn't say much. I could see him biting his tongue, holding in all of the things he really wanted to say. 

"Just don't change who you are for someone else, ok?" Were his only words of advice. I rolled my eyes at that comment though, because who did he think I was? It angered me how Rob thought he was my parent. 

The following day, I had gotten in touch with Sam and decided I was going to attend the concert. I wanted to see where things would go between us. I mean, he was a guy I've had a crush on for years now... Who wouldn't want to see where that went?

As I was pacing my room, trying to plan out when I needed to be ready to make the concert, I stopped at my calendar hanging on one of the walls near my bed. I gasped at the sight of the words printed largely all over today's date, GRACE'S BIRTHDAY DINNER.

"Shoot!" I scolded myself. Grace was one of my best friends from high school. Her boyfriend set up a party for her at some fancy restaurant. I would just have to call and cancel. Sam's concert was tonight, and I couldn't pass up his offer. I dialed Grace's cell phone number and waited for her voice mail.

"HAPPY BIRTHDAY GRACE! I won't be able to make it to your party. I'm so sorry. I'll definitely make it up to you, ok? Dinner on me? Anyways, sorry this is such a short notice. I met Sam Bernard yesterday. We were flirting on and off. He completely made me forget about everything. I hope you're not mad. Anyways, call me back. See you later! Love you!" I hung up the phone. Guilt started to fill my conscience. Grace and I haven't seen each other in a few months. It wasn't my fault, though. We both lived on opposite sides of California. I was always busy with premiers and concerts. She was always busy with her family. On the days that I was free, she wouldn't be.

I sometimes thought she just came up with excuses to not see me. Grace has always been a conserved person. She doesn't enjoy being in the spotlight. I remember I took her shopping with me a few years ago... We were with Rob, helping him find a new suit. The paparazzi wouldn't leave us alone. Grace barely spoke to me the whole time. I could tell how awkward she felt.

That was the problem with Grace. She had multiple different personalities. She could be so confident and funny at one moment and then the next she would be so quiet and shy. I guess she didn't want to be in the tabloids.

If she wants to be my friend, she has to deal with it. That was always my conclusion when I felt bad about not seeing Grace. I couldn't help it. It wasn't my fault that I was always so busy.

"Rob?" I knocked on his door. He opened up and looked at me.

"What, Riley?" He said. I could sense the tension in his voice. He was trying not to parent me, which I appreciated. But, that was very hard for him. 

"I'm going out."

"To?" He demanded an answer.

"Uh... Dinner with Grace. It's her birthday." I lied. I didn't want to deal with more lectures from him about getting involved with the wrong crowd or whatever it was he felt like he needed to protect me from. None of it made sense to me anyways. If Sam was the wrong crowd, why did he hang out with him? They weren't best friends, but they were friends.

"You're not going to Sam's concert?"

"No... I think you're right... I mean, I've had a crush on Sam since forever. But, if you think he's involved with the wrong people, maybe I shouldn't see him." I lied some more. I knew I was digging myself into a deeper and deeper hole as I continued, but I needed to get him off my back. If he knew I was going to be with Sam tonight, he would not leave me alone. 

"You're good." He stated, not even making eye contact with me.

"Good?" I questioned his comment.

"You're a good liar." He turned his head to face me. "Sam's manager called me to ask where he could drop off the VIP passes."

"I just... I didn't want you to stress out. I'm not your kid, Rob."

"So you're blowing off your best friend to go hang with some guy you've known for a day?" His question made me feel guilty. I anxiously played with my hair, unsure of how to respond.

"It's not like that..." I whispered.

"People love you because you're you, Riley. Sweet little Riley, America's Sweetheart. You're down to earth. You're real. You're not like a regular celebrity, and people can see that. That's what keeps you where you are."

"Are you saying I have no talent?" I scoffed. This conversation was taking a bad turn.

"No, Riley! Of course, I'm not saying that. But there are a million people who have talent in this world. Are all of them as successful as you? No. Hell, most of them can't even make it. This industry will eat you alive, and you need to hold on to what makes you a normal human being. You ditching your best friend to go hang backstage with a band is leaving a bad taste in my mouth." 

"Choosing to hang out with Sam instead of Grace doesn't make me a bad person!" I defended myself.

"Bad? No, not there yet. Shallow? Yes, a-hundred-percent." He scoffed.

"You want to insult me? I can insult you back. You talk all this talk about me needing to keep a normal life and me needing to not let the fame get to my head. Well, the fame has already gotten to yours! Mr. 'I'll only date a model'." My face was stern. I was starting to get angry.

There was a slight truth to my words. All of Rob's past girlfriends had been models. Once he started dating his most recent one, tabloids started going crazy saying he was only interested in the looks of a woman. Of course, that gave the media something to hound him about. Even though it wasn't entirely true, it bothered him.

"Riley, you need a dose of reality, kid."

"I'm sure I do." I said sarcastically. I rolled my eyes and walked away.

"Why the hell are we fighting?" Rob said from his room. He groaned. I knew this conversation wasn't meant to be blown out of proportion like this, but it was too late. 

"Because you can't stand to see someone like me for who I am. You can't let me grow up! Am I supposed to stay sixteen forever? It's like you can't let me be happy!" I yelled, stomping away. I knew what I was saying wasn't true, but I was so angry at him for calling me shallow. I was so angry at him for always butting into my life and making decisions for me.  

"I can't let you be happy?" Rob was confused.

"Nope. You can't."

"Maybe it's time to live somewhere else, then. If all I do is make you miserable, move out. You're a big girl. Go buy your own home. Stop mooching off of me."

I walked into my room and shut the door. Stop mooching off of me? How was I mooching off of Rob? And did he really mean I should move out, or was anger getting in the way of his thoughts?

All I knew was that I needed a break. I needed a break from the spotlight. I needed to get away from everything. Where could I do that without the paparazzi finding me, though? Where could I be a normal person?