Ever After ━━ Oliver Wood

DAILY PROPHET: Princess Josette, Hogwarts's Very Own Royal!

by Rita Skeeter

          THE CAT IS OUT OF THE BAG! Hogwarts fifth-year Jo Sheridan (or, more accurately, Josette Cerise Valentina Sheridan Fauchelevant) has been confirmed royal by none other than yours truly, Rita Skeeter. Josette — a rather plain, bushy-browed girl that some might call unremarkable — is the result of a torrid affair between the recently deceased Prince Nicholas Fauchelevant (former heir to the throne of Jenovia before his mysterious passing) and St. Mungo's healer Caroline Sheridan.

          (How on earth a frumpy-looking witch like Ms. Sheridan managed to catch the attention of a Muggle prince is as much of a mystery to me as it is to all of you, dear readers. Perhaps the work of Amortentia ... or something even more sinister — the Imperius Curse? Your guess is as good as mine ... but I digress!)

          According to her peers, Josette (15) did not return to Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry in the fall for her fourth year of education, sparking a matter of intrigue amongst a portion of the student body. Though not at all popular or even well-liked by her classmates (the girl has been described by an anonymous source as, "possessing rather average intellect and something of a nasty temper" — a damning indictment for someone meant to run her own country, if you ask me!), Josette's disappearance was nonetheless a topic of conversation.

          Rumors circulated, ranging from whispers of rehab to (even more scandalously) teen pregnancy — but the truth was far more shocking! The missing teen had actually been away in the quaint country of Jenovia, with special permission from headmaster Albus Dumbledore (a man notorious for playing favorites when it comes to his Gryffindor students), immersing  herself the culture of her deceased father's homeland under the tutelage of none other than the queen regent herself, Adeline Fauchelevant.

          According to my sources, Josette will not take her place on the throne of Jenovia until she reaches the age of majority in a meager three years time. She has since left Jenovia behind and returned to London so that she might complete her education at Hogwarts before assuming her duty as the only direct descendant of the Fauchelevant bloodline — lest the throne should be passed on to another distant relative. (Perhaps the Grimaldi family?)

          Still, the princess's return to Hogwarts could not have come at a worse time, considering the recent escape of notorious mass-murderer Sirius Black from Azkaban. Allegedly, Black is rumored to be on the hunt for the infamous Boy Who Lived, Harry Potter (13) — one of Josette's fellow classmates and Quidditch teammates — and wherever Potter goes, tragedy seems to follow.

          Merlin save the (future) queen?

a/n: article idea creds to bree!!