Hidden Scars: A Fairy Tail Fic

Chapter 52: Change in Perspective

Wendy's POV

"Hey." I flinched at the unexpected deep voice coming from behind me as I was gazing into the crackling flames of the campfire. Still keeping my arms wrapped around my bent knees, I turned slightly to look over my shoulder, feeling a sense of instant relief when I saw Mest-san's handsome profile walking up to me. I smiled shyly up at him before turning back to look into the fire without saying anything.

Truthfully, during our journey back home I had been avoiding Mest-san just a little bit. I had been pouring all of my extra energy and magic into Levy, strengthening her muscles that were not getting any use while she was paralyzed so that when Porlyusica-san hopefully had the chance to heal her she wouldn't find walking painful. As I had spent those quiet hours doing all I knew how to do to help Levy, a seed of thought seemed to penetrate into my mind, slowly sprouting roots and digging in deeper and deeper as the days went by. With so much on my mind, I had come to shy away from Mest-san's quiet support. Because if I went through with what I was planning...

"Where has Shararu gotten to?" Mest-san asked as he sat down next to me, close enough that I could reach out and bump my shoulder against his arm if I wanted to, but not by accident.

Mest-san really is incredibly kind, I thought with a familiar flutter in my heart. Glancing over my shoulder, I realized that Mest-san had a point when Shararu's familiar white fur was nowhere to be seen. I guess she realized I needed some time to think, I thought, feeling bad that I had probably been spacing out when she had told me where she was going.

"I'm not sure," I responded quietly, turning back around to stare into the fire. One of the logs shifted slightly, causing several of the logs to fall on top of one another and sending up a shower of sparks that flickered in the night sky for a few seconds before fading out of existence.

"You don't have to tell me if you're not ready," Mest-san said, his deep voice soft as he looked at the fire as well. "But you seem like you've got a lot on your mind lately. If you want to talk then I'm happy to listen."

I glanced over to see that Mest-san had turned his gentle green eyes towards me and I could see nothing but patience in his expression, highlighted by the light coming off the campfire flames. My arms tightened around my knees unintentionally as my body seemed to scream to me to fall into his strong arms and have him shield me from the world for just a few minutes. But I swallowed quickly, burying that urge deep inside me as I closed my eyes briefly and then opened them again to meet Mest-san's gaze.

"The past few days I've... been thinking a lot about my powers," I started, my voice sounding timid and unsure even to my own ears. Mest-san's brow furrowed slightly in mild confusion, but he remained silent as he gave me his undivided attention. My eyes wandered over to Levy-san and Gajeel-san. They were still laying on the ground, but I saw that Gajeel-san's massive hand had seemed to swallow Levy-san's smaller one into his palm and I felt a small pang of gratitude towards him.

"I know I'm still young and I have a lot to learn, but ever since I met Phaedra-neesan I have never been so frustrated at my lack of healing knowledge." As I slowly unburdened the thought that had been plaguing me, I felt my resolve deepen as everything began to click into place. "First, I didn't know how to help Phaedra-neesan after she was kidnapped. Then I ran out of magic before I could completely heal Freed-san. And I have absolutely no idea how to heal Levy-san's paralysis..."

My fingers dug hard into my arms as all of my sadness and desperation flowed out of me as I listed off all the times I had failed my friends. I was a little surprised when Mest-san didn't immediately try to tell me I was being too hard on myself, but I was very grateful that he remained quietly by my side. Waiting for me to finish my thought.