“Why are you doing this?” I asked with tears in my eyes.
“I’m sorry Eleni, I thought I loved you, but I really don’t, I don’t care anymore, I have to leave I’m going back to California and I want you to try and forget about me.” Justin replied standing there in the front yard of my house.
“So you never loved me, I was just a charity case, you never cared, you just needed me for the show.”
“Yeah pretty much, they made fall in love with you so you would come on tour.”
“I can’t believe you.” I pushed him aside I ran into my house; luckily no one was home to see me collapse on the floor with tears. The one guy that I thought actually loved me, never really cared for me. That’s why I never wanted a boyfriend, I was scared of this happening and Justin knew that.
I got a text from Ryan saying that all the things he just said weren’t true, but I honestly couldn’t believe anyone anymore. I heard the doorbell ring; I cleaned myself up a bit and when to answer the door. Ryan came waltzing in “Eleni, you seriously have to listen to me, he wasn’t meaning any of it, and he really does love you. You weren’t a charity case; he is just being really weird lately.” He said apologetically.
“No Ryan, I don’t believe it, out now.” I held the door open for him to leave.
“You’ll see.” He responded
It had been a week since Justin had broken up with me and they were 50 missed calls, 5 voice messages and 20 texts from him alone, yet I still didn’t reply.
I decided that I would listen to the voice messages; I plopped on my bed and unlocked my phone:
“Eleni, babe answer the phone I need to talk to you.”
“Please pick up.”
“Eleni, you have to hear me out”
“I’m sorry.”
Those 4 first messages I didn’t really care about or listen to but it was the last one that caught my attention.
“Eleni, I am so sorry for hurting you, I know I was such a dick and I know you will never forgive me or love me in the same way. But I just you to hear me out. I broke up with you because people were saying nasty things about you and I couldn’t stand seeing so many people sending hate to you, it broke my heart and I believed that the only way to fix it was get you out of the picture, but that’s wrong because now there’s no one standing behind you and holding you cry. I do love you, you are the most amazing girl in the world, you were never meant to be a charity case and I know your past with boys, I wish I never did it, I wish I could still wake up to you and hold you, your beautiful don’t let any tell you otherwise. I am so sorry for everything that I said. I just couldn’t handle seeing you get hurt, I believed that if I got over you it wouldn’t hurt me, I wasn’t thinking about you I was just thinking about myself and I felt like such a jerk, but now I’ll never hear your beautiful voice again and I won’t be able to live every day without hurting myself until I know you forgive me which will never happen,…..
There was a long pause I could hear my uneven breathing and feel the salty tears stream down my face
….I love you Eleni, I’m sorry.”
The line dropped and layed on my bed not knowing of what to do.
I looked down and saw the locket that Justin had given me; I turned it over and read I will never stop loving you.
I ripped it off and threw it in the draw next to my bedside table.
Christmas was drawing nearer and as much as I wanted Justin back I was starting to get over it and beginning to think I will live alone.
As my mum and I were in the living room listening to the radio I heard one of his songs come on and I felt the tears stream down my face.
“Do you want me to change the channel?” My mum questioned me seeing the pain in my eyes. I shook my head and started mumbling the words of the song.
“I don’t wanna miss out on the holiday, but I can’t stop staring at your face, I should be playing in the wintersnow, But I’mma be under the mistletoe. With you, shawty with you, with you, shawty with you, with you, under the mistletoe, with you, shawty with you. With you, shawty with you, with you, under the mistletoes, Kiss me underneath the mistletoe; Show me baby that you love me so.”
That was when I realised that I forgave him, I still loved him and I could never let him go. I quickly texted Ryan saying that I’ve realised that I still loved him, I didn’t want to text Justin because I thought he was over me and wouldn’t care.
I went to sleep that night with tears in my eyes knowing that my heart was still with Justin, he was only caring for me, and he didn’t want me getting hate. It was Christmas the next day and I was hoping it would bring cheer.
~
“Eleni, you have a visitor” My mum called from downstairs, I ran down stairs to find Justin standing outside in the snow with a present.
I stopped about 1 meter away from him.
“Merry Christmas.” He said
“What are you doing here?” I asked shocked
“I’m sorry Eleni, Ryan said you’d forgiven me and I wanted to see if it was true, so Eleni if you do forgive me, will you please, please be my girlfriend?” He asked
I thought about it for a few seconds and then ran into him and smacked my lips onto his warm smooth ones. It was this that I missed so much, I felt all the warmth inside me and then he broke away with our foreheads touching.
“Is that a yes" he asked cutely
“Yes, I love you, Merry Christmas.”
“I love you too”, he pecked me on the lips and followed me inside.
