My Art (and other random things)

Relationships and Quarantine

So this is going to be a rant just to let you know. Or like two rants. Sorry these rants are all over the place and are long so sorry.

You are not obligated to read this. I repeat you are not oblogated to read this. I just need to rant and if you do read this that's great but if you don't that's perfectly fine.

Something important to know for this rant is that I'm Aroace (asexual and aromatic meaning I dont feel sexual or romantic attraction)

Society is annoying they expect you to be in a romantic relationship. I'm not out to anyone except my cousin but we barely talk and see each other so I dont know if it really counts.

Every one is always asking if you are in a relationship and something in out society is focused on these relatonships. Almost all charictures in books movies and TV shows seem to fall in love or that's the main focus. Almost all songs are about relationships, breakups, wanting to be in a relationship, ect.

I understand that relationships are important to so many people and that's fine if you want a relationship but not everybody does or they want a relationship that society does not deem proper or normal.

Why do you care about others relationships  yah you can ask how other are doing in relationships but why should you pry into people's life or look down on others if people say they dont want one or they want one that is different then your expectations of a relationship.

I don't want a relationship now and I'm fine without one. Im would be happy to be in a QPR with someone not right now but maybe in the future who knows. But people   say things like one day I'll fall in love so somthing like that or I'll find the right one. No one had said this to me directly but I'm terrified to hear someone say it. I dont want to fall in love. I just want to be surrounded by my friends.

I'm scared to come out to gor fear that I'm going to be told that I'm too young to know or that I'll find someone somedays. I'm scared my family and friends will hate me and I'll be alone. It makes now sence considering a large portions are in the LGBTQ+ community. Their is still gatekeeping and aces and arose and other less known groups are ignored or are told they don't belong.

Finding out I was Acearo made me so happy to know it was normal to not like anyone. I wasn't alone.

Anyway I originally ment to talk about how these expectations of relatioships effect me.

My grandparents facetimed and I talked about how I was learning to drive and and taking drivers ex. I also some how came up that I couldn't quite drive yet cause I dont have my permit and I can drive alone or something like that. My grandparents said something along the lines of ypu can just have you boyfriend drive you around for now. I didn't know how to react so I sat there awkwardly and said I dident have a boyfriend. Since this it was like two days ago I still haven't gotten it out of my head. And with that statement they where assuming so much.

1) that I have a boyfriend (I dont)

2) that I like boys. I could have a girlfriend of other partner (again I dont)

3) that they would be about a year at least older. In my state they would actually be able to drive one not family member at 16 with a few requirements. I could have a partner that is younger then me or closer to  my age (again I don't have a partner or significant other)

4) that I even want a boyfriend, girlfriend or significant other. (I don't want a significant other)

So that anoyed me and I couldn't stop thinking about it.

I never have talked about likening someone or anything like that to my parents (cause I don't like anyone). So dating was never really talked about. So my mom and I where in the car and she mentioned that if I wanted to date anyone to tell her or to say something if I am going to date someone. I dont know exactly what she said. I said ok but I'm not dating anyone or planning to so. I dont know my parents view on LGBTQ+ I think their ok with I but I'm not shure. They have never said anything about it bad or good. My dad has never mentioned it and my mom has only mentioned it a few time in neutral statements more like facts. I dont know if that makes sence. But then she had this conversation with me she dident use any gender specific language only said if I want to date someone. That has made me happy, I don't know if it was by accident or on purpose that she didn't gender who I could date or not but it was still nice to here. She also didn't say when instead she said if. I thinka she is talking about high school years since not a lot of people know about ace or aro but it was nice not to feel pressured to date anyone. Who knows what my future may bring of my family asking if I'm daiting but I don't  think my parents will bring it up to much but I have a feeling it will get worse and worse with my grandparents. I'm not excited for when in finishing high school and past that when my familys going to probably bring up I have no significant other.