Good Mom, Bad Mom

I was so proud of myself.

Truly.

It had been a great morning.

My youngest two were on a trip with me to the library.

Benign.

That's what I think of about these trips.

Pleasant, relaxing and benign.

It's a library for crying out loud. It's designed to be benign, you know?

Just you and stacks of books to wander effortlessly into, transporting you to another time and place.

With two toddlers in tow, and a Mommy and Me group to attend, it was supposed to be a benign, little day.

Standing in line at check-out, a pile of love-worn books to bring home, I lost myself in a little smidgen of sinful pride.

I was a Good Mom.

My kids were learning to love books and their local library, and it was all my fault.

Gold star for me.

...AND then my two little angels decided that sticking their hard-earned, library bookmark...

(Did I mention the bookmark was metal? Who gives toddlers METAL?!? Hell---O, Ms. Librarian Lady are you TRYING to turn the rest of my hair grey?)

...into the electrical socket behind us...the very OLD electrical socket that SPARKS like the freakin' 4th of July when poked with metal bookmarks!!!

HO-LY SHIT!!!

This kind of stuff doesn't happen at the library. Where did my serene, calm morning go? Where was the benign pleasure I had had only seconds beforehand?

Jeez, Louise, can I use that defibulator over there?

After my heart started back up again, (my angels were fine, by the way; no harm done) and the staff turned the lights back on...

(...or tried to. Did you know library emergency lights run on a different circuit? I do...het hem...now. Thank goodness for that!)

...I tucked my tail between my legs under their beady, little eyeball, ice-cold glares...

(who knew librarians could get SO mad? I mean, it was just a wee little fire, you know? Hardly worth getting upset about.)

...mumbled a pathetic apology and RAN the heck outta that place.

Bad Mom.