'Have lunch with me.'
I replayed the sentence over in my head. Had that been a question or an order?
I looked down at the hand still holding my wrist. I expected to feel the usual rejection my body automatically responded with when someone touched me. Only it didn't happen. Nothing specific did for that matter. The lack of anything happening to me, was a big deal.
There were few people that I could interact with on any kind of physical level and those few were my family and my friends. Percy's touch was becoming less and less of an issue for me now but even with him I sometimes stiffened before I could stop myself.
Why wasn't I stiffening at Pierce's touch?
I looked up at him and caught him watching me with a curious glint in his eye. The glean triggered what I had been waiting for. I stiffened but even I knew the rigid set of my shoulders this time was due to reasons other than my aversion to physical contact.
"Um..." I murmur.
Pierce removed his hand and took a step back. I was appreciative. I may not be reacting physically as I usually did but my mind was still affected by his close proximity. I could think better without him being so close.
"Would you like to have lunch with me?" he repeated.
I noticed it was definitely a question this time which initially triggered relief as I was about to firmly decline. But as I did so, as my lips moved to form the words, I hesitated. Despite all the reasons to say no, and I had some very valid ones, I felt that sliver of curiosity I had been feeling about him raise its frustrating head.
Pierce seemed to take my silence for acceptance as he said, "Good, come on," and started walking towards the door.
I didn't move. I wanted to. I really did and that was a difficult thing for me to admit, but I also replayed our initial encounters and his follow up performance with his sudden appearance and continued ugly innuendos. Those things just didn't disappear because I felt drawn to him.
And I was. Completely.
Nothing like this had ever happened to me. I was never curious about someone I met. I never became emotionally mixed up when dealing with someone. And I had never been attracted to anyone. And I was all of these things.
With him.
I swallowed as I finally came to terms with my feelings. I didn't know why I felt the way I did. I completely didn't understand him nor my reaction to him. I just knew he made me feel things...
The curiosity to understand it was starting to overrule my usual grounded self. Common sense and Pierce Lucciano didn't seem to belong in the same sentence.
Pierce looked back at me when I still didn't make a move forward. I stared back at him fighting an internal battle where I wasn't sure there would even be a winner. Go with him or not? Somehow, I felt I stood a chance loosing either way.
"You haven't answered. Coming?" he quizzed his eyes curious as they watched me.
It was the lack of snide laughter hidden in his eyes that made me brave enough to address the life-sized elephant in the room. I was nervous and I hated initiating conversations like the one I was about to have, but according to Archer and the guys it needed to be done. And I had to agree.
"That makes us even cause you n... never answered my mine?" I finally said, looking at him with a shy but determined gaze.
"So, is that a no?" Pierce asked, and I watched his nostrils flare as he breathed in deeply.
I held my ground. I searched for the right answer. It wasn't a no. At least, I didn't want it to be a no but...
"You have to answer t... two questions honestly."
He didn't say anything for a second and I thought he was declining but he suddenly flicked his hand in an ask-away gesture.
I felt relief at his agreement. Relief along with a tiny flicker of pleasure deep inside at the thought that he was agreeing to answer me because not doing so meant my not going with him. Was spending time with me that important to him? I felt silly for feeling so happy about this possibility.
It was also confusing and irritating and... maybe a bit scary as I didn't know what it meant or even what to do with it if it did.
Trying to dismiss the unfamiliar thoughts and feelings from my mind I focused on asking my questions. It wasn't easy staring at him and asking but this kind of thing never was for me. Some level of uncomfortable was pretty much the story of my life.
"Why did you say what you did Friday night? Why did you show up at m...my house Saturday morning?" I asked.
"Why is it so important to know?" he countered with a sigh.
I continued to stare at him. His expression hadn't changed. His eyes had though. For the briefest moment they had darted away from mine as if he was uncomfortable with my question, before they had quickly returned and were now staring me down.
So intense and straightforward was his gaze now that I had to wonder if maybe I had imagined his show of unease. I knew I most likely had. Pierce had from the moment I met him, projected a persona of unending confidence. My two simple questions couldn't have possibly made him flinch.
Giving up on any hope of that, and focusing on getting an honest answer I went on to say.
"Admit y... you intentionally acted weird. You got off on freaking me out. Your behavior raised red flags," I rushed out, irritation rising in me that he wouldn't just answer.
"Flags?"
"Flags," I affirmed. "As in with an s, as in more than one," I continued to clarify, emphasizing strongly that I had some serious trust issues with him.
"So, you're scared of me?" he asked back.
I thought that was an unfair question but decided to answer anyway. I gave a short sharp nod of my head.
"A bit."
He puckered his lips as if a sour flavor had invaded his mouth. His lips twisted and I watched with an odd fascination as he suddenly smoothed them out and moistened them with his tongue. His expression altered as if he had come to a decision.
"The second question is easy to answer," he abruptly said. "I came to your house to sincerely apologize. Believe it or not I don't usually taunt my employees with sexual innuendos of that nature or any nature, for that matter."
He was looking me in the eye as he spoke and I could see his sincerity. His gaze was unsettling and the topic was as uncomfortable now as it had been then, but I couldn't seem to look away despite my discomfiture. I continued to stare at him as he continued to speak, my wide unknowingly expressive eyes locked on frank blue.
"I knew I had crossed a line," he admitted with a light grimace. "You were owed a genuine apology not the begrudging one I gave that night. I try to be fair. I wasn't with you."
I was shocked by his answer. He was being more candid than I expected. I nodded back awkwardly. Though the conversation that night still had the ability to embarrass me and I didn't enjoy rehashing the entire scene, his openness was making resurrecting the unpleasant memory at least endurable.
