Mistletoe

December 13th

Saturday December 13th

10.57am

To say I was a little perplexed about yesterday's behavior was an understatement. I didn't know what had come over me, why hadn't I just walked up to him? Or, at the very least, walked out of the woods? Pretty sure just standing there, immobile and staring, made me a certified stalker.

I was running on autopilot today as I kept going over the scenario in my mind, getting angrier and angrier with myself. Every time I heard the door open I looked up from where I was restocking our counter, only to feel myself getting both disappointed and a bit relieved when Parker didn't walk through the door.

Disappointed because a part of me really wanted to see him.

Relieved because I wouldn't know how to act if he actually did show up... would I be able to act normal? Or would I have to tell him that I had actually seen him last night, to then explain why I hadn't said hello?

It was probably best for all parties involved if I didn't see him until tomorrow.

There was a massive fault with that plan though, and that was the fact that I was stuck at work for several more hours, and Parker had a track record of stopping by here. All I could do was to mentally prepare myself if the situation should arise.

I knew I was overanalyzing and blowing everything out of proportions, but I couldn't help myself. It was just how my neurotic brain worked most of the time, and it was exhausting. I'd often been told that I didn't have to know every single plausible outcome of a situation and that I should just stop obsessing. It was easier said than done. Besides, I doubted that the people giving the advice away had any idea how it was to live inside my head and I envied that. It must be so organized and quiet to be a non catastrophic thinker.

Sighing out loud I went to fetch more syrup as we were running low on several types, just to give myself something to do.

"It's Saturday," I told Em when I got back. "It's not supposed to be this quiet!"

Emma was wiping the already clean counter, and despite the look she wore on her face telling me she pretty much agreed with me she said, "It's still early, people are probably just sleeping in."

"I hope so," I grumbled and threw my head back in annoyance. "Whatever, I'm going on my break. Holler if it suddenly becomes the apocalypse in here."

Her lips twitched a little as she tried to keep herself from smiling. "Will do."

Of course she didn't have to and when I returned fifteen minutes later Pleym had gone from being completely empty to having a whole person sitting at a table. But that was it. It didn't really rally up a big count.

When the clock turned one and we'd only had people wanting to take their coffee with them, and hardly anyone actually stay, I was beginning to get extremely confused. The lack of people temporarily overshadowing my obsessive thoughts about yesterday's events.

"This is getting ridiculous," I told Emma as we stood behind the counter, not sure what else there was to do as we'd already done the dusting, cleaned the floors and relined the chairs several times over. Everything was spotless behind the counter as well. We were literally all out of things to occupy ourselves with.

Eventually a woman came in and ordered a toffee latte to go and while Em was making it for her I couldn't hold my tongue any longer. "Do you know if there's anything special going on in town today?"

"It's St. Lucia's day!" Judging by her enthusiasm I was supposed to know what that entailed for the lack of people venturing into my work. My blank stare must've tipped her off and she continued with her explanation, "They're handing out saffron buns in the square, and there's a children's choir singing christmas carols while people help finish up the setup for the Christmas market."

"Really?" I told her, "Well then things suddenly make a lot of sense."

Em handed me the finished latte and I passed it to the woman. "Here you go, enjoy your day!"

When she was gone I leaned against the counter. "Did you hear that?"

"Yup," Em replied with a nod. "I'd completely forgotten about it, but it makes sense."

"We've been outplayed by free saffron buns and probably cocoa as well."

Em laughed at that and shook her head. "Honestly, though. We don't really need to be two people here today. Do you mind if I just go on my break now so that I can get something to eat before you leave?"

I told her to just go ahead because it wasn't as if I had anything particular to do once I got off, but Em was right; there was no reason for it to be two of us working today. It was just a waste of resources.

02.04pm

The house was ridiculously quiet, so much so that it made me stir crazy. There was nothing for me to do except for walk around from room to room. I tried to sit down with my sketchpad, but my concentration was apparently dancing naked in a field of flowers with a cocktail in hand. In other words there was no way for me to coax it into cooperating with me.

"Come on you," I told Sergeant, deciding he might as well get a walk out of all this. Needless to say he did not protest. I was envious of him as we walked through the streets where he wagged his tail like there was no tomorrow wishing I too could just turn off my brain for a bit.

But I was me and so that was not possible and therefore by the time we made it back I was ready to implode on myself.

In an admirable attempt to occupy myself - that in my unbiased opinion deserved some recognition of sorts - I dug out my schoolbooks. Even though I was finished with all my assignments I still figured I could study for my exam that was on Monday, even if it was an open book exam and I'd already devoted more than enough time to studying.

It was a very boring day.

03.45pm

As soon as it became acceptable timing I started to make dinner; grilled chicken with bell pepper stuffed full of rice, and a lot of greens on the side. Music was playing loudly, ricocheting off the walls as I sang along, luckily the high volume drowned out my off tune singing.

Everyone was pleased by my newfound urge to do housework and because of my dedication I was released from clean up duties, so it was basically a win-win on my part. Instead I retreated to my room and proceeded to clean my already clean surroundings.

I really needed a life. Desperately so.

Lying on top of the covers I closed my eyes in an attempt to block the world out, I had to resort to plugging in my headphones, but eventually it worked. My mind was replaced by lyrics and tunes, slowly lulling me into a trance.

When the darkness came I welcomed it with open arms, releasing a breath of relief as it took me under. Finally I'd catch a break. Colors swirled around me, creating a mesmerizing scene as they twisted and turned together; a silent dance to a rhythm that was not for my ears.

I felt light, free even. Relishing in this newfound freedom I set off into the blue, green and red, only to have more colors appear before I eventually stepped out onto a vast green field. Looking back I could still see the rainbow-like atmosphere behind me, a big contrast to the quiet, and realistic, scenery in front of me. I was a little torn as of what to do next, but as darkness quickly fell around me I sat down on the ground and looked around.

In an instant a million stars lit up the sky and it began raining streaks of lights that disappeared in the horizon.

I woke up with a start. "Oh for crying out loud," I muttered in the silence as my music had stopped. I'd been going for a nap to take my mind off Parker and everything else in my life. Trust my brain to conjure up a ridiculous scene involving a meteor shower.

"Thanks a lot brain." I scrambled to my feet and grabbed my sneakers and running tights.

Desperate times called for desperate measures.