Something About You

Three. June, 2008.

Niall's got calluses on his fingers from learning how to play guitar, and Mully's got a terrible new haircut. The school term ended for the summer a few hours ago, and someone, Niall already can't remember who, had the idea of throwing a little party on the shore of Lough Ennell, a celebration of the end of Third Year. With the promise of doing his chores for three full weeks, Niall's conned Greg into driving him and Mully to the lake so he can bring his guitar—he's been practicing Wonderwall so he can play it for everyone.

It's chilly for late June but the sun is out, and they drive towards the lake with the windows down. It feels free like this, Niall thinks: the empty road ahead of them, the empty summer unfurling. It's one of those moments where everything feels possible, just within grasp, and Niall feels like he can breathe—deep, satisfying breaths that fill his lungs up with fresh summer air and a little bit of salt. He's hopeful, guitar pressed against his shins as they drive.

Speeding, Greg asks, 'who's all going to be there tonight, then?'

Niall's taken the backseat—he wanted to sit next to his guitar, protect it from Greg's terrible driving. From the front, Mully says, 'everyone,' and Niall sees Greg roll his eyes in the rearview mirror.

'Most of the class,' Niall elaborates, and he already knows where Greg's next question is going.

'Any girls?'

'There are girls in our year, yeh,' Niall fixes his gaze out the window, watches the countryside zoom past them as they fly down the N52. It's bright and sunny and if he doesn't pay attention to license plates Niall can pretend he's not in Ireland. He'd like to be driving down the Pacific Coast Highway, he thinks, on a road trip through California with his guitar and his friends. He'd like to be somewhere where the sky is a little bigger, the water a little warmer, the possibilities a little wider. Somewhere that isn't Mullingar.

Instead, he's here, and Mully is talking, and when Niall tunes back in he's saying, 'I wonder if Colm and Isla will show.'

'Colm McAnderson?' Greg asks. 'He's your mate, why wouldn't he show?'

'Been too busy with his new girlfriend Isla to hang out with his mates recently, hasn't he,' Mully says, like this is something everyone should know. The car keeps speeding on, but Niall feels everything inside him lurch to a sudden stop.

'Isla? Isla Boyne? Since when?' Niall has enough wherewithal to be impressed at himself for getting it out without a voice crack—he's been having a lot of those lately.

'Like three weeks, mate, where the fuck have you been?' Mully twists around in the front seat so he can look at Niall. 'Everybody knows.'

'I didn't.'

'You're not listening then, because it's definitely come up.'

'No, you definitely never told me. I never would've—there's no way I would've forgotten that.'

Mully raises an eyebrow at him, then, 'you okay, mate? Why do you care so much?'

Niall knows Mully can tell when he's lying. But he also knows that he doesn't have an answer for Mully's question right now. He feels weird and uncomfortable—like he's got something sticky on his skin, like his stomach is churning, like something's about to go terribly wrong and he can't figure out what it is. Mully knows Niall well enough to tell when he's lying. But he also knows him well enough to know when to drop it.

'I don't.' Niall shakes his head. 'I don't. I'm just surprised, s'all. Isla's my mate, thought she would've told me.'

--

By the time Isla and Colm do show up, the sun's gone down and everyone's a few cans deep. Niall's stumbling his way through Wonderwall but everyone seems to like it anyway—Deo is singing along a little too loudly and Mully's dancing with Siobhan Foley and Niall thinks he could get used to this performing in front of a crowd thing. He's not even halfway through the song and all he can think about is when he'll be able to do it again.

And then, all of a sudden, all he can think about is Isla.

Niall hadn't noticed her arrival but she's here now, sitting cross legged on the grass in a pair of jeans he hasn't seen before. She's watching him sing and it's almost enough to catch his breath in his throat until he notices Colm next to her, arm slung over her shoulders, face turned to look at her. She's wearing Colm's football hoodie, too, and it almost makes him stop in his tracks because he has the same one, only with HORAN // 8 on the back, not McANDERSON // 12. And then there's a sudden pang in his chest, like that feeling when you tighten a guitar string too much and it snaps, a sudden realization that he'd wanted to see her in his hoodie—that he's angry, or maybe sad, that she's wearing Colm's instead.

Colm leans over to whisper something in Isla's ear and when she laughs Niall feels that tightening in his gut again. Her laugh, loud and light and perfectly in tune with his singing, carries out as Niall finishes the song. His friends clap and cheer and Deo's shouting for another and Niall can't look anywhere else, can't think about anything else, can't manage to do much more than start playing again, his fingers moving of their own accord, his mind running a million miles an hour to nowhere at all.

He catches Isla's eye, fumbles the opening riff to Dancing In The Moonlight, and carries on.