Weird Things I've Seen/Commented on Instagram Comment Sections With No Context

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"That's cool and all, but Gru is the most powerful being in the universe and here's why: Gru is 4 minions tall, which means he's a godly size of 14 feet tall. Furthermore if any of you remember the original Despicable Me, you know there is a scene where Vector kidnaps the three girls and shoots a series of heat-seeking missles at Gru, he then dodges them all. According to the speed of an average ballistic missile (1900 mph) and the size of a missile according to his ankle size, Gru can perceive and move at such a speed that the missiles only move 9.5 miles per hour, 0.5% of their original speed. After this Gru punches a shark and it is paralyzed meaning its spine is probably shattered, to remind you it would require a force greater than 3,000 newtons to fracture the spine. That's equal to the impact created by a 500-pound car crashing and into a wall at 30 miles per hour. I rest my case"

                -some kid on Instagram