Am I a monster?

Trying again.

I just couldn't bare it. Wasn't she meant to be my best friend? If she cared about me, wouldn't Yuzu encourage me? Maybe,   I've become, so much like him, even my friends dont trust me, anymore.

"Please," I thought, "Please, Yuzu, explain!"

As if reading my mind, she texted me. At first, I was unsure, whether, or not, to see her message.
Eventually, I gave in, and saw it. What I read, honestly, surprised me.

Yuya, you've been
snapping, at people,
lately. Also, you've
been talking down,
to people. Do you
understand, now?

No, you're wrong!
I would never do
something like that!
You know I'm not that
type of person!

That's why I didn't
expect it.

What?

She simply didn't reply. It was, as though, she had never been texting, in the first place. However, even in this situation, I needed to continue.
All my live, people would call me nothing, or useless, because my father left, but that was out of my control. They didn't see that. They only wanted to hurt me, more.

That was, probably, the reason I became like this. At first glance, or conversation, you wouldn't expect the way I act to be a negative impact. Instead, you would have thought I built courage to never back down.

The truth is the only thing I learned was to create an image, for myself, and never filter, otherwise people would hate me. Now that you know the truth, you don't believe that it was for the better, do you?
Honestly, I will my father told us he was busy. That way no one would think he was a loser, or coward.

Because of my father, I have suffered, so much, and he decided to come back, saying he had to travel dimensions, without even telling us, before he left.

Though, I still miss him. He's so strong, and brave, despite everything that happened, and I wish I could be like him. If I was like that, I wouldn't have to pretend to. I could be real, but it's not that easy.

Damn it, I've been thinking way too much, into this. Maybe, I should give up. If I continue duelling, I'll continue to be viewed, as a monster, but I don't want that. Is there a way to duel, without being viewed, as one?
Surely, there is. I just hope I find it, soon.